


Soulmate

by curiobi



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cursed, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, First Time Bottoming, First Time Topping, Fuck Or Die, God's can be Jerks sometimes, Have to, Hot Sex, Hot Wincest, Lust, M/M, Please give Kudos if you like what you read, Possessive Sam, Smug know it all Ash, Soulmates, Tell me what you think I love me some fan discussions! ;D, Wincest - Freeform, dub con, please comment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-11
Updated: 2016-08-18
Packaged: 2018-06-01 17:58:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 23,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6530224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/curiobi/pseuds/curiobi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If you're in love... you're DEAD!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Preface: Notes/Possible Rant, Legal Disclaimers, and Characterisation

****Hello everyone! I thought the best way to get into writing again despite my hectic schedule was to stop procrastinating and just post a completed work already! I hope you like it and I hope this earns me some small measure of undeserved forgiveness for never posting in anything comparable to a timely fashion.  
Years of college, university, a degree in Computer Science and now running my own business has me frazzled most of the time; however, as that jerk said in The Matrix "If we do not ever take time how can we ever have time?" Yes he was smug-faced jerk, but he wasn’t wrong! -and with shipping less of the dirty thrilling secret of us fangirls as shows like Shadowhunters actively ship their two males leads, we have to rejoice and… and… take back our damn shipping lanes fangirls before the norms ruin everything!!!

Look, I am all for what Shadowhunters did with hashtagging Magnus and Alec because A: it was **HOTT** and B: They frigging mean it!!! Unlike certain other shows and networks- remember the fiasco a while back when some A-hole network was all "vote for your favourite shipping couples" and then cancelled the vote when they realised the vote was almost pure Sterek, and tried to weasel out of it by spouting nonsense about it "not being canon" instead of just admitting it was **pure unadulterated** homophobia, especially since this was around season one or two of Teen Wolf and no one had any idea if Sterek was going to be cannon at that point, least of all the damn writers!- and then the awesome Jack Barrowman had to call the network out on their bull! not to mention their complete lack of understanding about ships, and the often vehement passion it inspires.

Honestly! You can just picture this scenario starring out of touch network fat cat giving his subordinates headache-

_'Is that what the kids are calling it these days shipping? Ya know my granddaughter says it's all on the online now, I know let's make a vote for these kids and they can tell us what guys and gals they want to see together, splendid idea if I do say so myself!-_

_**'-wait aren't those two boy's names!** Stiles and who the hell is this Derek fellow O-o? Must be something wrong with the online, fix it will you! ... still happening you say? Well, I just don't understand these kids these days! Why don't they want this Stiles to find a nice girl? That's normal, that's what normal people want to see'._

_'Yes, I know we've had three sexual assaults and a kidnap-murder storyline on our teen network this month alone, but that's normal, that's real life, bad things happen to women who- um, go outside or whatever, **everybody knows that!**  So it's okay to show that, but two men together what kind of degenerate would want to see that?!- _

_'I know; it must be the gay agenda clogging up the online- just cancel it to protect the kids these days ... the fans are angry? ... um look we can't have two men, sin in the eyes of god and whatnot- now go make sure the lead actresses on all our shows know we need them all to wear wonderbras this season, **and would it kill them to lose the damn underwear!** \- oh yeah the shipping couples vote thing, just cancel the damn thing, I'm telling you, the gay's these days, so damn pushy, it's all human rights this, and representation that, look, just make some excuse so the gay agenda doesn't send us letters- I can't be dealing with that right now ... Yeah tell them about the cannons or whatever that sounds good, now get my secretary in here, I want to have a word with her about trying to wear flat shoes in the office, **what the hell is this, communist Russia?!'**_

My point is **Screw you frigging lousy ship-jumping norms** trying to hop on the bandwagon without understanding a thing about where it's going!-, jeeze, can’t we fangirls

squee 

most heartily 

 

over **_anything_** without the mainstream sticking their commercially driven oars in!- all like

**Jeeze! **

So to redress these infringements upon our fangirls seas by frigging tourists!- and to prevent the sinking of my Armada into further disarray, and most of all to captain my fleet of ships once more all like-

_(um, yeah, still not fast with the uploads... but I own that now, by trying to make each thing hotter than the last!_

So, um, Yeah, drumroll please!

er... Thanks!

**Dear readers, I give to you Soulmate!**

Please as always let me know what you think and please give kudos to (still) starving writers generously,  _for I say unto thee truly, tis mothers milk... or metaphorical rum, **whatever** , please just gimme ;D PLEASE! _

Also _**please**_ read the next chapter because it sets up the story! Thanks

curiobi **@ ~.~@**

 

#  ** ************************** **

####  **Legal Disclaimer: **

I do not own supernatural… _but a girl can dream!_

  ** Characterisation **

The characterisation for Dean here is based on Supernatural Season 7 after Dean believed that Cas had died after betraying him, he was a mess because he was mourning Cas and he was drinking all hours of the day, even stopping to buy alcohol to top up his flask on a case. Dean is surly, alcoholic, and hiding his problems behind a reckless lust for the hunt, in other words he's Dean at his most self-loathing and self-destructive.

 


	2. Prologue

Sam has Lucifer in his head, and it's slowly driving him nuts, on top of this he is really, really worried about Dean.

When a new case comes up, Sam starts to think about what happened after he and Dean were assassinated by vengeful hunters. Dean had found Sam in heaven reliving some childish Thanksgiving dinner, and after convincing Sam he was dead rather than dreaming, Cas had appeared via fake TV screen and proceeded to get pissy with them for not realising they should be looking for God rather than arguing about their differing interpretations of Winchester family Thanksgiving past.  
  
Then there were forced to experience some uncomfortable damaging revelations about their lives during an extended trip down the Rabbit Hole trying to find god. Just when things were at their worst Zachariah had chosen to interrupt the hell of the search to introduce them to the hell of trying to escape from an angel on foot in heaven while he mocked them for it, and insisted he was only after them to resurrect them, _after he tore them a world of new vessel holes for defying him._  
  
Things got even stranger when a man disguised as a luchador appeared, rescued them from Zachariah and took them to a bar; fortunately, the man turned out to be their long dead friend Ash and he’d given them refuge and much needed beer while giving them the low down on their current situation. That was when he learned that heaven was basically like the matrix with everyone hooked into their own personal dream land except in special cases when two people shared a heaven.

When Dean asked what he meant Ash had looked at them both and said 'you know, **_Soulmates_** '.

In retrospect, he hadn't given much thought to the wider implications of he and his brother sharing a heaven at the time because even if he had known what the hell he was supposed to do with a piece of information like that there were more pressing matters at hand such as evading the apoplectic Archangel on their ass while trying to get a meeting with actual God, and even if that didn't burn the eyes out of their skulls, and they were resurrected _again_ _(because according to Ash this wasn't even close to the first time they had both died),_ they still, with or without help from God, had to derail the impending frigging apocalypse that he was responsible for starting in the first place after being manipulated by Lucifer and played for a fool by Ruby and the suicidal insane Lilith. In short, **bigger fish to fry.**

Now he was forced to think about it with this case, because if he and Dean really were Soul Mates **_they were targets._**


	3. Dangerously In love

“So let me get this straight Sam, young couples supposedly madly in love with their whole lives in front of them are suddenly going full Micky and Mallory for no reason?”

“That's what it looks like this is the third couple this month. I don't get it, if it's a ghost or demon why's it jumping bodies like this and why ‘loved up’ couples, _think it’s some kind of messed up death don't us part thing?_ ”

“Who knows, people have to be crazy in life to get married, so figures they're also nuts in death, screw the reason Sam, they're dropping bodies, so let's track and gank the sons of bitches”.

“Yeah obviously, but let's at least try and find out what were up against, rule number one remember, why are you so trigger happy lately?”

Dean shrugged and took a swig of whisky straight from the bottle.

“Isn't it a little early for that?”

“Blow me” Dean muttered, his tone surly.

“No thanks”, Sam snorted, “Who knows where you’ve been”. He knew even before turning to see the vacant hollowed out expression of pain on Dean's face that he hadn't responded to the insult because he was once again lost in thought. Since Dean had lost Castiel pain had been eating away at him, but it was more than just the loss that was driving Dean to one of his worst alcoholic binges in a long time, _it was the betrayal_. Dean had trusted Castiel completely, and even after Bobby begun to suspect Cas had gone dark side it was only Castiel confessing his involvement with Crowley to Dean's face that had finally convinced him.

He wanted to help his brother deal, but how could he when Dean flatly refused to talk about it and was burying all his feelings in a bottle? Sam sighed, Dean was particularly difficult to be around when he was like this, and he hadn't seen him this bad since… their dad.

Him, Bobby and Castiel, that was it, that was what Dean had, and losing Castiel had done something to him, broken something that he wasn’t prepared to deal with because it meant facing just how close the two had become. He understood, he missed Cas too, because the Cas that had betrayed them, that had broken the wall in his head, that had killed Bobby’s friend, had been pushed over the edge by the horror of fighting a bloody civil war where no matter the outcome he still lost, because either way the broken bodies of his own brothers and sisters still lay at his feet.

Sam watched as Dean finally moved his eyes still glazed over and unfocused as he forced more pain numbing alcohol down his throat. He knew Dean better than anyone, he knew the thing haunting Dean was that right at the end, it wasn’t the Cas had gone dark side and betrayed them all that had died. That Cas was their enemy and they been fighting to bring him down with everything they had. They'd even bound Death and Dean had told Death to kill Cas in front of Cas, he hadn't wanted to, but he had been prepared to do what it took to stop him, and if it had ended there maybe Dean wouldn’t be in so much pain, but it hadn't worked out that way.

Cas had freed Death who once unbound was their problem not his and disappeared, after which death had given them clear instructions to reign Cas in our else kiss the planet goodbye. Things then went from bad to worse when Cas, corrupted by Crowley, infected by monsters so evil God locked them away, and crazed on power he couldn't handle, did the thing he feared the most and slaughtered thousands of his own brothers and sisters.

Finally, the monsters took Cas over completely and committed an outright slaughter of innocent humans, when Cas finally regained a small measure of control he finally realised that he wasn’t God, he was a mutated Angel just like Death said, _and he was in over his head._

Cas had finally responded to their call- or more accurately his call because Dean had refused to speak to or even about Cas at that point- when Cas had appeared he was barely alive, his vessel was disintegrating from him absorbing more power than it could contain, and the monsters inside him were almost free to descend upon the world.  
In a last desperate attempt to set things right Cas had sacrificed himself in the gruelling ritual to return the Monsters to Purgatory, but just when all hope seemed lost Cas miraculously survived. Dead one minute and then returned to him the next, Dean's head had been spinning, he was mad as hell at him, yes, but at least he was alive so he could kick his ass.  
He knew Dean so he knew he would have forgiven Cas eventually, but it wasn’t to be, Castiel's last act on earth had been to shove Dean away and tell him to run, because some of the Leviathan Monsters had survived and he was too week after the ritual to fight them off. They had killed Cas in front of him, used his body to attack him and Bobby, and then walked it into the Ocean essentially burying it at sea, leaving Dean unable to even give his friend a hunter’s funeral, because in the end the Cas Dean had lost had been his friend, the one who he would die for and who would die for him, and his last act had been trying to protect him.

Sam sighed again and rubbed his eyes tiredly as Dean took another swig of whisky, closed his eyes and breathed out slowly resting his face on the back of the chair he was straddling. It was difficult for him to accept that he couldn't help Dean if Dean wouldn't let him, he tried to take scant solace in the fact that given enough time Dean always found a way to cope with whatever was eating at him, but that was what was worrying him, hunters were not notorious for having a lot of time, their number was up from the moment they ganked their first monster, that was just how it was, and since they were no longer of any interest to Angels, there would be no more magical resurrections, and for the first time he was seriously worried that Dean was becoming reckless, which was about the worst thing that a hunter could be.

If he was honest he hadn't wanted to take this case, but if Dean didn't hunt he would get even worse. Sam sighed and closed his laptop, if they were going to do this they were going to do it right. "We should go have a look the bodies".

#  ** ************************** **

“Well I guess that's why it keeps jumping bodies these ones are burned up from the inside out, whatever it is it's burning through its hosts and has to keep finding new ones”.

"So is it one thing that it infects people in pairs or are we dealing with some kind of supernatural Mickey and Mallory here?"

“I don't know but we better find out before it does this to another couple”.

“I hear ya, they have as much right to grow to hate each other, then try to stick it to each other in the divorce as everyone else, let's at give them that”.

Sam rolled his eyes.

#  ** ************************** **

"Yeah I know why the other couples couldn't save each other".

"Why?"

“Well the only way to get them out once there in is to join their bodies and-

“-You're telling me 'lovey-dovey' couples couldn't jump each other's bones?- that makes no sense”.

“…it's not that simple Dean, I've been checking into the lore on what might be doing this and I think it all goes back to an ancient god”

“Dean sighed “these days doesn't it always”.

“Well it says here that there is a legend that might explain all this, let me see, the legend about what we might be facing has a story behind it, I'm gonna read it out loud so listen up”.

_“A young warrior who had returned from battle prayed for twenty days and nights giving reverence to the divine. The temple's deity's vanity was stroked by the warrior’s devotion and so the deity appeared to him in a vision and asked him what was the true desire of his heart. The warrior said he wanted someone to love him and someone he could love. The deity offered him the pick of any woman in the village he wanted, and as a boon for his devotion, the woman would instantly fall in love with him”._

_The man thanked the deity humbly but said it would do him no good, the god realised what the young man wanted but the toll of the war meant all the eligible men of the village were dead. However, the man’s utter loneliness was such that the deity was moved and told the mortal to hold out hope because his boon would be granted”._

_“The deity, having never noticed the deeds of mortals before was intrigued. The young warrior was revered in his village. Songs were composed and sung about the warrior, a man so courageous and fierce in battle he'd single-handedly routed a battalion of their enemies even though he was outnumbered a hundred to one”._

_“When he had returned from dispelling his enemies he found that the attack had been a cowardly diversion and that all six of his brothers had been slaughtered in an ambush”._

_“The villagers sang that such was his pain and grief he attacked as if possessed by the strength of the gods, putting such terror into their enemies as he attacked their camp again and again to retrieve the bodies of his beloved brothers that instead of displaying the body parts of the fallen as was the enemy’s custom they bought them to him whole and untouched, laying them at his feet in a sign of ultimate respect before fleeing for their lives; but it was too late, the warrior had no mercy, no pity for the cowardly murderers of his beloved brothers and had pursued as filled with the wrath of the gods themselves, slaying all in his path until not one man among the enemy was left standing-_

“-Can we speed this along Sam?”

“No, this is all I could find in the lore about what might be going on here, and we need all the information we can get if we’re going to figure out what we’re trying to gank and how, _so shut up and listen_ ”.

“Fine, but if I pass out it’s from your boring me to death, _not the whisky”._

Sam sighed. “Where was I? … Okay _”._

_“Yet even after having dispatched the cowards to the underworld to forever bear the scorn and shame of their ancestors, the horrors befalling the brave warrior did not end, for, disease, starvation, and death claimed the few wounded warrior’s that had survived the battle as they travelled back to their village and in the end he alone returned alive with the bodies of his brothers and fallen comrades tied to the horses they had ridden to battle”._

_“The warrior had walked with no food or water for many days, yet he did not blame the gods for the cowardly actions of man, and paid homage to the gods even as he tended to his fallen brothers, and lit their funeral pyres. Even as he prevented his six sisters in law and their daughters from being thrown onto the funeral pyre’s so they could attend his brothers in the afterlife as was the custom”._

_“The warrior did obeisance to his brothers even though he was the oldest and begged of his brothers spirits, may your souls find rest, may your warrior spirit forever intertwine with mine, may you always live in the hearts of your beloved wives, may you see your precious daughters grow and bear your name, may you be joyful until their mortal days are spent and they go to you and attend you forever in the afterlife, until then, Feast, drink, and enjoy the fruits of paradise my brothers, and before you have had time to wonder what keeps us from your side, we will all be as one again”._

_“The villager's hearts were so moved by the young Warrior's prayer to the spirits of his dead brother's they agreed to forgo the burial customs and break with tradition of sending those beloved of mighty warriors to join them in the afterlife. The warrior sent his brothers wives and daughters to live in the village of women, where the widows and daughters of the fallen could go if permitted to live; yet in the doing he found himself completely alone, devoid of all family, cursed to live and die alone for not dying on the battlefield with his brothers, and unable to fall on his sword because of the promise he had made his beloved sister-in-law and nieces that he would not. Even though they had been sent away he was bound by his word- and was this not justly his fate? Should he not live a cursed, wretched existence for failing to save his brother's lives?”_

_“The war in which the warrior had lost his brothers had been waged in the god’s honour and even after all that had befallen him, he was here paying homage to her, and asking nothing in return until she approached him and asked his heart’s desire, even then he did not ask that she grant it, he only did as he was bid and unfolded his heart’s desire to her. The god found she had a rare moment of pity for the brave heartbroken young warrior, and finding no suitable mate for him among the mortals in his village, and drawn to him and driven to fulfil his wish, she did the unthinkable transforming herself into-_

“-Wait, hold up, this god was a chick?”

“Ah yeah, apparently, now listen, says here, _The god -_ well I suppose goddess is more accurate, so- _the goddess transformed herself into a man and spent the night with him, during that night they both fell deeply in love, but the spell could only last one night, as gods were forbidden to spend time on earth in mortal form, when the morning came the goddess had no choice but to return to her godlike form and leave her lover behind”._

_“When she returned to her realm she felt the loss keenly, but the other gods had found out about her encounter with a mortal and had gathered to ridicule her for being so taken with a mortal, when all gods knew that mortals were only good for sustenance, the most they could ever be were mindless servants and sport to the gods. They also mocked her for taking on the guise of a man when she was so vain and proud of her feminine beauty, they said that by transforming herself for a mortal she too was now only fit to serve them just as mortals did”._

_“The goddess became inflamed with rage- and prideful and furious at being mocked she returned to earth and killed her lover in a fit of rage to show the other gods that he meant nothing to her other than a temporary diversion, but as he lay dead at her feet she regretted her actions”._

_“For the first time in her long existence, the pain and suffering of another bought her pain, and she tried desperately to bring him back to life but she was a goddess of destruction, she could only take life never give it, and such was her regret for taking the warrior’s she forsook her pride and begged and pleaded with the other gods to bring him back”._

_“But the other gods secretly hated and feared the mortal who mere humans had begun to worship like a god, and knowing she was the most prideful among them, their ridicule had been a deliberate attempt to engage her wrath so she would slay the mortal and her worshippers -of which out of fear she had more than any of them- would lose faith in her for slaying the hero that have suffered so much in defence of her name and temple, and with their mortal hero dead the mortals would finally forsake their cruel goddess and turn their worship to them, for were they not as deserving of worship as she?- and then the mortals fear, faith and reverence would act as living sustenance. They would feed and grow stronger, **strong enough to finally defeat her** ; for each of  them despised her, she was the oldest and strongest of them and most favoured by the elder gods before them who had gifted her with power they could never hope to achieve individually”. _

_“The other gods had not imagined that the goddess who was the most heartless and cruel among them would regret slaying a single mortal when she had demanded the lives of countless mortals as sacrificial tributes over the aeons- and with their plan failed and fearful of the goddess's wrath, the other gods pretended to appease her by restoring the mortal to life; but hoping to at least turn mortals from him, they secretly took all that was good in him and hid it away. What they returned was a monster, vengeful and murderous, his only memory that of being slain by the one he had given his heart, of being betrayed by the goddess he had so faithfully served, for had she not sent the lover that slew him”._

_“The goddess's fury at the other gods was such it scorched the very ground beneath the feet of mortals, condemning countless innocents to a fiery death”._

_“The goddess raged at the other gods demanding they return his goodness and honour as a warrior, but the gods refused, saying she had only asked that his life be returned, that they had done, and would do no more, for they would never allow a mortal to be so revered by humans he was worshipped in their place”._

_“Furious at being defied, the goddess waged a vicious war to return the warrior's stolen honour, but the other gods turned his pure warrior spirit into a beautiful bird of prey and had their best hunter shoot a golden arrow through its heart. In doing so they forever killed the good that was in him”._

_“Realising that the man she loved was gone the goddess swore vengeance. She went to the warrior and found him standing among the butchered bodies of his people who believing him a god after his miraculous return from the dead had flocked to him to make offerings”._

_“The warrior was half crazed, not understanding if he was alive or dead thanks to the cruelty of the other gods, so the goddess told him that the other gods had taken his warrior spirit and returned him devoid of goodness for raising so above his station as to touch a god, and to presume to punish her for lowering herself to consort with a mortal, and for waging war with them to try to spare him the indignity of being returned with his humanity destroyed”._

_“The goddess was able to cure him of his madness by feeding him the rejuvenating waters of the blue celestial fountains said to be able to cure any malady in mortal or god alike, yet even the waters could not mend what was not there to cured. The goodness in him had been destroyed, there was no way for her to mend his corrupted soul”._

_“Yet as she spent time with him, tending to him and restoring his fractured mind until it was all it once was, she realised that she preferred him as he now was, for his twisted and damaged soul now better matched her own”._

_“She understood that it had never been his goodness that had drawn her to him, it had been his fierceness in Battle that attracted her all along, that underneath it all he was bloodthirsty as she, and with his gentle nature outside of war gone, he was now rage and violence personified **just like her** , and with the resurrection ritual imbuing him with superhuman strength the goddess further tipped the scales, giving him some of her power, joining her immortal soul to his mortal soul in a union that was forbidden, making him her equal in strength, her love in all ways and all things, as she was a goddess of destruction so was he now a lord of death, and together they became strong and utterly corrupt on their own power”._

_“Together they ruthlessly slaughtered the gods who crossed them, they bathed in rivers of mortal blood for sport, they ruled over the surviving gods with a blood drenched iron fist, and when the remaining gods opposed their rule they slaughtered them and their families. In the end out of desperation the few remaining gods strong enough to make a difference banded together and sacrificed themselves to save what remained of their families and their race. They called upon ancient powers since before the dawn of the Titans and forced the goddess of destruction and her warrior lover from their bodies with concentrated bolts of lightning, in the ensuing confusion and battle they destroyed their bodies and cursed their souls so they would be forever separated, forced to wander the earth alone as disembodied spirits for all eternity._

“There's nothing on what happened after that but we know that they must have broken the curse somehow because they're clearly together, and since their original bodies were destroyed they're using human hosts too, but were talking old world gods here and old world magic”.

“Kinda too much for your average millennial to contain huh”.

“Yeah. I don’t think they're shopping for the perfect hosts I think they're just burning through the bodies because the bodies don't last long”.

“When they burn out they go hit the nearest loved up couple for replacement meat, lucky for them there’s enough loved up idiots crushing on each other for them to keep trading models”.

“No Dean, just crushing or even being loved up is not enough, to be suitable hosts they have to have a real connection to each other, to have fallen hard, that’s not as common”.

“Well I wouldn't really know about that Sammy you're the only sap around here that's been madly in love”.

“Oh really, so we’re just going to gloss over Lisa and Cassie? You wanna play it that way?”

Dean shrugged, “anything else on what kind of couple they might go for next? We got newly in love so no golden oldies, but other than young and in love we got nothing to help us track their next move”.

Sam looked at his laptop for a moment, “well this is interesting should help narrow it down, it says here that only the best will do”.

“You mean like the hottest? come to think of it all the couples who died were definite nines I’d say that one blonde chick was the full ten, I mean before she got char grilled from the inside out, so I guess we got to look for a super hot couple who are madly in love".

“Not just that Dean, while she was known for her vanity, she was also known for superior intelligence and fierce strength and her mortal lover was said to have beauty that rivalled the gods and to be such a skilled warrior it was said no man could defeat in armed combat, in fact it looks like this may have been the main reason the other gods were so jealous of him, they feared a mortal man who was better than them in bravery and looks would soon win the heart of the people and sway them against the gods as the people had grown tired of the gods quote petty heartless tyranny and of being used as pawns in the never-ending squabbles and infighting amongst the gods'.

"Hang on if this Warrior turned Lord of Death dude was into dudes why does she keep picking chicks to inhabit I mean shouldn't she be going for Brad Pitt?:

Sam frowned, “I don't know, maybe she can't inhabit a male body or…' Sam quickly typed on his computer than rolled his eyes and frowned harder in a way that told Dean someone had upset his highly feminised sensitivities, "I just checked on gay male couples who had turned up burned up on dead, says here that 2 have in this town alone, it seems homophobia kept the papers from mentioning the 4 men that died were actually two couples”.

“Do you need a hanky Sammy?”

“Shut up Dean. I'm cross-referencing on a wider search of deaths of single males from mysterious burning from the inside out…. hmph, well big surprise, all in all there's been eight in the surrounding towns counties and cities and that's only a three city search”.

“Unclench Sammy you're gonna hurt yourself. We will find a way to gank them and then it's right on to the damned obituaries writers, **lousy insensitive bastards ****”.**

“You're not funny Dean”.

“Oh I’m hilarious, you just have no sense of humour”.

“According to the vic’s bios, they were all engaged, just like all the hetero couples, if they had listed them right we may have been able to make this connection sooner and realised how many victims there actually are, were, how quickly they're burning through the bodies and if it's been getting better or worse or-

“-Yeah-yeah does any of this tell us how to gank them?”.

Sam blew his fringe upwards with an exasperated exhalation and glared at Dean, “all this info tells us that they actually target male couples first but because statistically they are going to be less of them and we know they burn through the bodies they take pretty quickly, they clearly move onto hetero couples when they run out of same-sex ones”.

“So why don't they just stay in good old San Francisco or L.A?”

“Dean will you stop! even in a town like L.A mountains of burned up bodies would attract attention; they have to keep moving”.

“Is there any kind of thing they won't burn through? I'm only asking because vampires mate for life, that makes the connection something these asshole pagans could use; and the young, not-afraid-of-hunters type that freak Boris was collecting would pass the pretty test, if they jump Edward and Bella and can’t be burned out of those bodies, then we're gonna have to deal with super-powered freaks _wearing_ super-powered freaks, like this case isn't complicated enough as it is, and we still got nothing on how to actually gank them”.

“I was getting to that, everything I've read so far doesn't have them ever inhabiting anything supernatural, maybe they can't or maybe they just don't want to I don't know, it also says here the union of two souls is the only kind of body they can inhabit permanently but interestingly it's also the only thing that can kill them”.

“What? that doesn't make sense, iron salt, silver, now that makes sense, where are we supposed to find two unified souls to gank them with? Do they sell that on eBay?”.

Sam ghosted a smile in Dean's direction “Beats me but that's what it says”.

“I don't get it, are you saying that none of the hot couples they burned through were… er unified, no I don't get it weren't they all supposed to be crazy stupid in love with each other, that's all anyone we talked to said about them”.

“I'm not saying they didn't love each other it's-

“So what… wait, is this because none of them were married yet?”

“It's more complicated than that-

 _“Judgmental ass hat gods_ you can't tell me that a ceremony and a piece of damn paper means more than how people feel about each other”.

“No, _and stop interrupting,_ we’re not just talking about a union here, were talking about a _cosmic_ union of souls that's… well it seems that's _rare_ , so rare that no one's ever been able to get them out once they're in”.

“So what the hell are we supposed to do Sam, how are we supposed to gank them cus last time I checked my EMF can't scan for cosmically connected couples or whatever”.

Sam rubbed his forehead and closed his laptop “yeah even if it did, and they did jump into two people who were cosmically connected it wouldn't necessarily mean that they could burn them out, in fact all it might do is give them some new pretty meat suits to call home permanently, in fact that's the likely scenario, the mojo it would take to burn them out once they were in is above most humans pay grade”.

“But still, after all this time you'd think they'd have found at least one suitable set of matching meat suits”.

Sam shrugged “as I understand it cosmically connected soul mates are rare Dean, I'm not talking just one in a million rare I'm talking one in a _billion_ ”.

Dean nodded “okay, let's say they can't find their ultimate matching meat suits, they seem to be able to find other couples with a rare bond easily enough”.

Sam sat back in his chair “you might have a point, maybe it's not that they can't find a cosmically connected pair maybe it's just that currently there are none to find”

Dean leaned forward and rested his head in his hands “maybe, but it still doesn't get us any closer to ganking them, I'm beat, lets pick this up again fresh in the morning, there has to be some way, I mean we can't just leave them free to burn through whatever innocent couple they like the look of”.

“Yeah there has to be some other way, and were gonna find it”.

“Alright, well I'm gonna hit the sack, night Sammy”.

“Good Idea- oh wait, wait- I found something!” 

#  ** ************************** **

 

“I just don't get it”, Dean yawned crawling off to his bed, “why do Pagan gods always and I mean _always_ have to be bat shit crazy?”

“First off you're kinda mixing up your pantheons-

“-Nerd

“-Second, we've been over this Dean, Yeah I know it's risky but there's no other way, if we can invoke the power of the ancient gods that turned them into spirits in the first place maybe they can bind their spirits again so they can't hurt anyone else, I mean it's worth a shot, otherwise we got nothing and they just keep on burning through people and killing”.

"All right, all-right, I just don't like asking monsters for help, _it never ends well_ ”.

“Technically they're not monsters Dean they're ancient gods and demigods, some could be considered-

“-I don't care, they're all the same Sam, chocked full of crazy and generally wanting to skin ya”.

Sam sighed “can't argue with that, but hopefully they will want those two dealt with as much as we do, remember they sacrificed their immortal lives to bind them so they really wanted them gone, let's just hope their spirits are pissed off enough when they realise it didn't work to help us”.

"Yeah, let's hope they don't just decide to take their frustrations out on us instead”.


	4. Hammer of the Gods

“Well that didn't go as well as I would have liked” Sam wheezed from his position on the floor.

“Aww you think?!” Dean rasped covered in plaster from where the angry spirits of the gods had thrown them around the room for being arrogant enough to summon them, they the eternal ones, they the great gods.

Dean had smashed the urn that was being used as a conduit to save Sam who was being smashed repeatedly into the wall, and both were sitting dazed and bloodied on the floor. As if that wasn't enough to be dealing with, two beautiful identical women suddenly appeared out of dusty air, one knelt and Dean's feet and the other at Sam's.

Dean's mouth fell open to say something but he found that he couldn't as the otherworldly beautiful woman kneeling at his feet, gazed at the woman who was kneeling at Sam's feet. Something silent seemed to pass between the two and then the woman returned her gaze to him, and he found himself powerless to look away as she handed him a shining sliver of pure light. Dean found himself reaching for the glimmering shard of beautiful light before he had a chance to think and the two women looked at each other again and suddenly vanished. The light dancing in his outstretched palm became solid and weighty transforming into an ornate dagger of intricate beautiful design carved of onyx and ivory and an inexplicable metal that shone like it was made of pure light.

“Whoa” Dean breathed in unison with Sam who had an identical dagger in his outstretched palm.

“Now that is not something that happens every day”.

“Yeah”.

“I'm guessing we can gank the freaks with these otherwise why give them to us?”

“I just wish there was a way to test them first”.

“Yeah I hear you but we gotta believe these will work, if they don't we got nothing and two pissed off angry spirits on our hands”.

 

#  ** ************************** **

“Whoa isn't that one of the chicks from last night look, Sammy, she's right there”.

Dean sat bolt upright in the impala where he had been nodding off on a fruitless stakeout of the restaurant they all but destroyed the day before after being attacked by the wrath of ancient bat shit crazy pagan gods past. The restaurant was closed for business today as the baffled owner tried to get repairs for the inexplicable damage making several loud angry calls to his insurance company in front of the restaurant.

“Dean I got one over on my side of the street” Sam's voice was low and urgent, “I think they want us to follow them”.

“You think?” Dean rolled his eyes as the women beckoned them over, their long hair flowing as if they were under water, their pull bizarrely irresistible considering they were both as creepy as fuck despite being beautiful.

“Can the sarcasm Dean, you got your dagger?”

“You can the sarc- um, yeah I got my dagger, you?”

“Yeah, let’s do this”.

They followed the two beautiful woman to where a happy couple were holding hands, it all seemed so normal they almost walked past them but the two women stopped and disappeared and the ‘happy couple’ began slaughtering people indiscriminately.

Sam and Dean charged them with the daggers and the woman reappeared holding their hands over their hearts.

“I think were meant to gank them in the heart” Sam yelled sprinting towards the murdering couple as blood sprayed in the air from the slit throat of the latest victim. The mystical woman pressed their hands to their foreheads and ran their unearthly pale hands down the front of their bodies.

“Heart, head, and body”, Dean yelled keeping up with Sam as they charged into the blood stained restaurant “I'm not saying they don’t deserve it but isn't that overkill?”

“I think it's meant to represent body mind and soul Dean”.

“Makes sense I suppose”.

The woman looked at them and Sam could have sworn he saw pity in their eyes but they weren't looking at the monstrous former gods turned angry spirits wreaking havoc in their current meat-suits they were looking at him and Dean, why? _what would using the daggers do to them_? There was no time to think about that as the monsters came charging at them and Sam yelled out as his arm shot out of its own accord controlled by invisible forces and the dagger plunged into his own heart.

“Dean!” he yelled frantically to see if the same thing was happening to Dean but his vision was blurred, the pain of the dagger rammed into his heart made it impossible to breathe, his pounding blood felt excruciating as his heart was struggling to pump blood around his body, he wasn’t bleeding right now, but if the dagger was removed he would bleed out. _He had to find Dean_.

“Sam!”

“I'm here Dean”

AWWW

 _Was that Dean screaming or him?_ he didn't know, the dagger was **moving** in his heart, he couldn't speak, couldn't see, couldn’t move, his arms were forced wide apart, his body suspended in mid-air, each move of the dagger feeling like razor blades slicing into his nerves. The dagger sliced its way out of his flesh and he braced himself expecting his blood to spurt from the wound, but there was no blood, it was like he hadn't even been cut as the dagger hovered in the air then flew forward plunging into the hearts of the shells the goddess of destruction and her warrior wore. The humans screamed in terrible pain as the daggers bored between their eyes, burying their way into their skulls until the screaming suddenly stopped, what remained of the human host's brains clearly destroyed as the daggers fought their way past blood and bone leaving a gruesome gaping wound. 

The daggers hovered before flying through the air guided by the same inexplicable power that still held him captive. Light exploded and he yelled out in pain as the light seared his eyes blinding him completely as the couples burnt out shells fell dead to the ground.

 

#  ** ************************** **

 

_…Didn't I tell you_

_But it's been so long my love, so long I had given up hope of ever having a permanent body to call home again_

_And so fine a body my love_

_Yes, this one is brave and strong_

_I leave the one with more feminised beauty to you his lips alone could drive a lover to distraction_

_I hope that is the case my love, I have grown wary, all this time wondering, no home, nothing permanent, then to settle into flesh only to have it seared away so quickly_

_It will not happen this time my love, this time, we have found those that we will wear forever_

_But it is not without risk my love_

_To walk by your side permanently, to not fear every time the flesh we take is burned away that we have gazed upon each other for the last time, that our spirits will once again wonder separate and alone- for this any risk is worth the reward. These bodies belong to mere humans, they are but children compared to us, they will have no way to resist us, we will take their flesh as tribute and consume their souls for substance, whatever is left by the wayside will be no more concern or threat to us then my former brethren were before we slaughtered them. Our only mistake was not slaughtering them all at once, if we had not stopped to bathe in their blood, to make love while we rolled in their entrails, they would not have been able to bind us_

_Do you regret such folly?_

_You never looked so beautiful as when you severed the heads of the twin goddesses of virtue and chastity and holding each head in your blood soaked hand you laid one head at each of my feet, how could I resist you, how can I regret loving you, no matter what the cost_


	5. Possession

“Sam!” Dean sat bolt upright in bed “I feel like my heart is going to explode out of my freaking chest, _and I can freaking hear voices,_ talking about cutting off heads and wait how the hell did we get back here, the last thing I remember is being used as a human shish kebab, then watching those poor saps bite it after being used as human pin cushions, then nothing…”

“I don’t remember coming back here either, and I can hear them too… I think… We've been infected Dean”, Sam's eyes widened and Dean froze mid pace.

“What, what is it, why are you looking at me like that?”

“Dean you… I recognise that mark from the legend about their story, look at the symbol on your back”.

Dean rushed over to the mirror, turning his back to it and trying to look over his shoulder, “oh my god that’s huge, how the hell did that get there? Do you have one two?”

Sam turned his back so Dean could look, “Wow that's, that's messed up I mean I always knew you were a girl Sammy but why the hell did I get infected with the loved up mark?”

“You're not funny Dean, and I really don't know how this happened, but I'm thinking the weapons had some side effects”.

“Like transferring the freaks into us instead of ganking them, but how the hell does that help?! they're just going to burn through us like everyone else, why would those weird floaty chicks do that, there has to be something else, a clue we're missing”.

Dean was touching him, tracing the symbol on his back, and Sam was shivering uncontrollably, but he wasn’t cold, his entire body was heating up as he sucked in his breath.

“Sorry, is it painful?”

 _… er, not exactly_ “don’t worry about it, try to find out what you can, we need to draw each other’s symbols, compare them, and see what we can find out in the lore and we need to do it fast”.

Sam was breathing hard and fast, _what the hell, Dean touching him was..._

“Wait hang on a minute Sammy we ganked those freaks hours ago, it's the middle of the night, how come were here instead of out on a killing spree?”.

Sam sighed in relief as Dean removed his hand, and suddenly it all clicked into place, he understood what had happened, they had been chosen, the look of pity from the spirits of the twin goddesses… they were damned if they did and damned if they didn’t, “I er, have a theory about that”.

_You got Ashland, Winchester land, everybody gets their own slice of the pie, their own private heaven except you two of course, certain people share, special cases._

“But you're not going to like it”

_You know **Soul Mates.**_

“Sam quit day dreaming and spit it out”.

“We're not on a killing spree because they can't take over our bodies to the extent they did the other couples burning their souls out and then burning up their bodies, well at least not yet”.

“Yeah I kinda gathered we hadn't been taken over, why? - and how long have we got?”

Sam took a deep breath and sat down on the bed, “Our connection Dean our relationship to each other, it's too strong they can't just take us, but it won't last forever if we don't do something to get rid of them eventually they will burn our souls out or bodies”.

“And then, what? we end up toasty on the inside like the others?”.

“No Dean not us, for us it will be worse, we won't just die and our souls be freed from our bodies, when I say burn our souls out of our bodies I mean our free will, but we would still be in their trapped forever while they go on a killing spree for eternity with no one to stop them while we, our souls or thoughts or consciousness would be left to rot in our own skins forever forced to watch the faces of the innocent people they butcher using our bodies”.

“No, no-no Sammy that's not right there has to be another way”.

“There's nothing we can do-

“So where just gonna wait here to die _screw that!”_

“No I mean there's nothing we can do other than...

“What? Spit it out already” Dean barked impatiently.

“You know what” Sam's voice was quiet because this went against everything… would change everything… but what choice did they have, this wasn’t just about their lives, if the monsters currently inhabiting them took over their bodies… the death toll before other hunters or maybe Angel's or even Demons finally subdued them would be astronomical… it was their responsibility to prevent that.

“No I don't, what are you talking about?”

Had Dean forgotten already? Sam sighed, “Dean there is a cure there is something we can do, I already explained this to you”.

“Wait, you mean we have to-

“Yeah”.

“No, no **_and hell no_** , I mean we can just have sex with someone else forge a bond with someone else, that's fine, I even like the sound of that”.

“It's not that simple Dean, it has to be someone you’re connected to on a _cosmic_ level”.

“I don't… well maybe… but who will help you?”

“Never mind me, who will help _you_. I know what you're thinking Dean and Cassie wouldn't work even if you could find her, and Lisa won't work either, first of all you were with her for a year, not the intense just loved up madness that would even be close to what would be needed to get them out of us, and more to the point, Lisa Doesn't even know who you are anymore _remember_ , besides, even if we could somehow get her to magically remember you, are you really going to tell me you had a _cosmic_ connection with her?”

“I… cared about her, and Ben, a lot”.

“That’s not enough Dean”.

“Well what makes you think you and me…”

“Dean were connected about as deep as it gets, there's no one we care about more than each other so no one else can give us a shot at beating them but each other, so it has to be us”.

“I can't believe I'm even asking this, but if we do… that and it doesn't work, then what?”

“Then we die Dean if we’re lucky, but you know what's likely to happen to us I already told you, we’d be trapped inside our own bodies watching as they tear through the world killing everyone in their path, because you can feel it can't you, even know when they’re barely connected to us, their bloodthirsty monsters, they only love the kill, they get off on it, there's no way I'm letting them take over my body to do that without a fight, no matter what it takes”.

“Sam this could… this could-

“-No Dean” We're not going to let it ruin us, after everything this won't be the thing that breaks us. Look if there was any other way, but there isn't and were running out of time, fast, I've got Bobby looking into it and-

“-Hey you didn't tell him about!”

“-No! I didn't say we got infected, how could I, we just found out! anyway he agrees that there's no way to get them out of a body once they’re in except to burn them out before they burn you up and take you over completely, and the only way to do that is burn them away with a connection so powerful it literally burns them out of the host they're in and destroys their spirits or whatever they are”.

“I can't believe this there _has_ to be another way”.

“There is no other way”.

“Hey why are you so calm about this”.

Sam's eyes narrowed “I'm not Dean believe me I'm not relishing being… I don't want you to do that to me but there is no other way-

Dean frowned “what makes you think that I would be-

“I can't imagine it being any other way you're far too stubborn and well _you_ for it to be any other way”.

“Pretty disturbed that you _imagined_ it at all”.

“Well since we know what we have to do, I'm figuring out how to do it, and I guess-

“-It ain't gonna happen Sammy

“Come on Dean we've been through this, it's not just about our lives, you know what they will do if they take us over, we’re a couple of ticking nukes right now, we have no other option, and besides I'm the one who has to suffer the most so why are you complaining?”

“I mean there's no way I'm doing that to you Sammy”.

“Well you have to unless you want us both to die and take countless others with us”.

Dean sighed his voice quiet… “there is no way in hell, I _can't_ do that to you Sammy, not ever, so I guess… I guess… it has to be me”.

“What!”

“You heard me; you have to do it to me”.

“Dean I can't do that”.

“You have to”.

“Dean”.

“You're the one saying there's no other way”.

“There is no other way, believe me”.

“Then let’s get this show on the road”.

“Dean”.

“What”.

“It's not that simple”.

 _“I knew it!_ what haven't you been telling me?”

“What, no I mean we have to have sex and we have to be cosmically connected to burn them out, I told you everything, what I mean is, I never, I don't think I can-

“Well your gonna have to, think you can score some Viagra around here?”.

Sam shook his head.

“Never know until you try Sammy this is a sleazy town, sleazy towns have sleazy dealers, and sleazy dealers can get you anything for a price”.

“That's not what I mean Dean, I mean it has to be a pure connection”.

“Meaning?”

“It can't be magically enhanced”.

“I know some guys live by Viagra but I think it's more pharmaceutical than magical Sammy”.

“Dean”.

“Alright, alright”.

“And you can't be drunk”.

“What! _You gotta be kidding me!”_


	6. To Ragnarok or Ruin?

Dean lay flat on his back trying to get the disturbing visual of Sam stroking himself to get hard and stay hard out of his head, but it was like a train wreck he couldn't look away even if he wanted to and Sam was fucking **_huge_** even though his face and body language said he clearly wasn't into it. He tried not to think about what epic proportions Sam could reach if he was actually genuinely aroused.

Dean glanced down at himself, he had nothing to be ashamed off and he knew it, the ladies were more than complimentary he routinely got ‘wow big and pretty’ or just wow ‘pretty big’ compliments, but he was not currently rising to the occasion, _which was hardly surprising when he would rather be anywhere but here right now._

Sam's was way darker than his, they'd been here for three weeks in this raging heat and he was covered in freckles but Sam was baked to a golden bronze tan, Dean wondered just what Sam had been up too on the few hours they worked the case separately because he didn't have any tan lines. “You sunbathe naked bro?”

“Urh what, no”.

Sam's eyes shifted guilty and Dean smiled despite his impending doom because the overgrown little bastard was lying. “When the hell did you find the time to get a nice even tan like that?”

“Look never mind” Sam barked “let's just get this over with”.

Sam rolled on a condom. “You can't be on V and I can't be drunk but condoms are okay?”

Sam shrugged. “Aphrodisiacs and alcohol were around in their day, condoms not so much, besides it won't alter the connection”.

“So that's just because you think I'm diseased?”

“Dean were covered in each other’s blood most every week, it's not about that, it's because well… I thought it might make it easier you know make it less weird if that's possible, this way we’re touching but were not really _touching_ you know”.

“But won't that fuck up the connection I don't wanna go through this only to have to die anyway, _or worse do it again_ “.

Sam sighed “You're not helping Dean, and this doesn't alter the fact were connected it's not about whether we enjoy it of not”.

“Well that's a good thing because that ain't happening”.

“And it's not about whether I use a condom or not, it's about one thing only the connection between us not altered by any passion inducing drug or fruit of the vine”.

“Please tell me that is a quote from the lore and you're not going all poetic on me now”.

“Providing we stick to those two rules our connection should do the rest but we have to commit the act to invoke a challenge to the god’s power over us and for that to happen”.

“Yeah I get it”.

“Our connection is there no matter what Dean it's in us, it's a part of us, a condom can't change that, and believe me if drugs and alcohol weren't expressly forbidden for the damn ritual I'd be as drunk and as high as possible I'd just as well not have to do this as well but we have no choice”. Dean was quiet and Sam hoped he wouldn't get mocked for the way his voice broke at the end.

“It's okay Sammy”, Dean's voice was gentle, “it's okay, we do this quick, we get it over with okay, let's just get it over with”.

“Dean please don't get all big brother on me now” Sam groaned “it just makes this harder”. Sam realised his mistake as his face reddened “I'm talking about the _situation_ Dean”.

“Yeah, yeah I get that”.

“Okay are you ready?”

“To get reamed by my little brother and his frigging Liam Neeson sized junk? No. _never_ but we have to so let's just get it over with”.

“Um do you want music?”

“Why the hell would I want music; _this isn’t a date Sammy!”_ Dean exclaimed, “I'm not a chick at prom, you don't have to make me comfortable before trying to sex me up, so let's just go already”.

“No, um to make it easier, you know, um mask the sound…

“Of you banging me? _Yeah not enough music in the world Sam!_ “

“Yeah but it still might make it easier too-

“-Sam you have the absolute _worst_ taste in music, and I think I have enough soul-scarring experiences without adding you banging me to the Jonas Brothers greatest hits to the list”.

“Well we could use some of your stuff-

“- ** _Not in this life_** “ Dean growled, “first, all my classic stuff is in the car, on cassette, _as god intended-_ you only have that douchebag iDock in here that can't play cassettes, _which is the main reason it's friggin useless!_ Second, if you think I want Zep’s ramblin on ruined by the memory of you-... Sam was giving him the damn puppy eyes and Dean huffed in frustration because even now off all fucking times it was working! “Oh my god you're a girl! Fine put on some Milli Vanilli if it helps your skirt slip off easier, _jeeze_ “.

Sam scowled at Dean, which made him smile despite the epic fucked-up-ness of the situation as Sam docked his stupid iPod. He glanced at the screen which read; Mo Better Blues - Soil and Pimp Sessions

Sam pressed the play button.

-and some deep bluesy jazz flooded the room as Dean's brows rose in surprise because it was actually a damn good sound. “Why gee Sammy, it’s like you have a routine, pity its only for your own right hand, I'm guessing when you feel wild and adventurous you switch hands and break out the Marvin Gaye”.

Sam huffed at him then their eyes caught and held… _so they were seriously going to do this…_

Dean started to roll over.

“No don't Dean, connection remember? This will work far better, and far quicker if were able to look into each other’s eyes”.

“Oh man that's just going to make this awkward, well more awkward”.

“Dean… I don't… I don't wanna hurt you”.

“I wish I could tell you that's not gonna hurt but… listen Sammy we've both had our asses kicked we've both been to hell, pain is something we understand, it's not going to break us, you're right, **_this_** _isn't going to break us,_ we have to do this so let's do it...Erm one last thing your buddy luci-

“-Hasn't been around since this whole thing started, believe me, that would have made this close to impossible”.

“I believe you”.

“Okay”.

Sam moved closer to Dean and lay over him on the bed, his skin prickled all over and he broke out in goose bumps, but it wasn't exactly pleasant it was overwhelming like when a sudden temperature change made your whole body shudder and go into overdrive to protect you; while this was going on he was frantically stroking himself, but he was having difficulty staying hard for the first time in his life.

“What do ya need?” Dean asked reading the situation “I've got some porn but I kinda doubt we're into the same thing”.

“Yeah busty Asian beauties is your thing not mine” Sam ground out his eyes closed as he stroked himself, overwhelmingly glad that Dean wasn't making fun of his inability to perform.

“You're missing out” Dean grinned and Sam snorted giving up and running his hand through his hair in frustration.

“Well there's Wi-Fi here, you need a few minutes to find something you like?” Sam wasn't respond and Dean opened his eyes to find Sam was staring at him intently.

“…What?”

“Nothing I'm just… I'm not sure if using porn…

“Pure connection, right, no drink, no drugs, no porn, jeez _do they even want people to enjoy it?”_

“Yeah most people can enjoy making love without any of those things Dean”.

“Don't believe everything you read in Cosmo Sammy, they might not need all three at the same time, but trust me everyone needs at least one some of the time”.

“Not if they're really into the person you're with”.

“Well I don't know how to break it to you Sam but I just don't think you're that into me”.

Sam sighed “this isn't working… _maybe if you stop talking_ “.

Dean scowled at Sam, then realised that Sam was shaking… “hey, come on Sam it's alright… it's a lot of pressure I get that, but you can do it… I can't believe I just said that… look, it's going to be alright, it's not… it's not really us, it's not about us, it's about them, the assholes trying to jack our bodies, we’re doing this to survive”.

Dean touched his shoulder, just like he had many times in the past, a brotherly pat, yet like before Dean's touch was like a lightning bolt sizzling his skin… thankfully Dean hadn't noticed and so he seized on the opportunity to take action.

Well whatever Sam had just been thinking about was working, but… Sam was… _seriously huge,_ and judging by the way he was having at that thing, he clearly didn't think it was ready, which meant it was normally bigger and harder, _this was going to hurt like hell!_

Sam finally seemed to think it was ready just as he was at the point of leaping out of the bed and letting the world go to hell, _because seriously there was no way that was going to-_ Sam nudged his legs further apart and he flinched in horror.

“Please don't make this any more difficult then it has to be Dean just try and relax, we can get this over with quickly if…”

Goddamn it there was taking one for the team, and there was this!- _and why the hell did he always have to end up on team save the world?_ How many friggin times was this now anyway? Why couldn’t he just for **_once_** , not be chosen, or destined, couldn’t he for once just sit back, have a damn beer and let someone else do the damn heavy lifting? Screw this. There was no way he was going to survive this physically, let alone mentally, how the hell had Sam even had a girlfriend when he was packing that thing?... maybe some women really did love a challenge… well, he was not a women and- wait yes think of a woman that might make it easier, but which one? Why just one? That hot set of twins when he was last hoorah-ing it before he went to hell, now _that_ was some night”.

“Dean please-

_-Of course Sam had walked in on that and damn near ruined it!_

“Dean I-

“-Sam would you _please_ stop talking, I'm trying to think about something else”

“Okay, just um tell me when you're ready”.

He tried, but apparently not even possession, torture and the impending end of the world could get the words out of his mouth and Sam took his continued silence as the refusal it was as he tried desperately to remember every aspect of being with the double mints.

“Okay… um, Dean”.

 _Christ Sam was really going to make him say it out loud!_ The most he could do was force his head to nod, and he was instantly regretting it as he felt Sam wetting him with what he guessed was saliva, putting that huge thing on his ass, and pushing forward as he sucked in his breath hard trying not to scream, because _fuck Sam was huge!_ there was trying to save the world and there was simple physics! “Stop, fuck, there's _no way_ that’s going to fit!”

Sam gritted his teeth and pulled back wetting him again and trying to push into him again, but he just couldn't fit. _He had to find a way to make this easier._ He got off Dean, and the bed and went to his duffel, rifling through it. “Almost forgot I had this, sorry, hope it works”.

“I knew it” Dean scoffed his voice strained even as he resorted to his usual ribbing as Sam climbed back onto the bed with a small tube in his large hand “I knew you had moisturiser, _you_ _girl”._

Sam ignored him and squeezed the lotion into his palm “You're going to have to let me loosen you up a bit Dean or we're never going to get anywhere”.

“You know how to do that?”

“Yes Dean, I know how to do that, _I'm not a monk”._

“No I mean with a dude”.

“Oh… no, but it can't be that different… Look you’re all cleaned up, so I'm just going to use my fingers to spread you a bit so I can-

“-Yeah, I get the picture Sam, just get on with it… maybe I should do it myself, less awkward”.

“Have you ever done that to yourself before?”

“Well no, I mean I had a girl do it to me once, but I wasn't as into it as she was and by the time she pulled out a dildo the size of Texas I called time on the whole thing”, Dean shuddered, “it's what you get for banging college chicks, _so damn experimental_. Now I stick to the ladies with experience, _in things I actually **like** “._

“So no, you haven't done it”.

“No, but I guess I have to cus there's no way that’s fittin otherwise”.

Sam stopped Dean's hand, “No I better do it, I have better access and I can see what I'm doing”.

“I cannot _believe_ this is happening”. Dean growled. They locked eyes for a moment and Dean sighed, “fine whatever, let's just get this over with”.

“Alright Dean, I heard you the first million times” … He only knew how to do this with girls, oh well it couldn’t be that different, so he just did the same thing he did with them, first one finger, and then two, then scissoring, then three fingers, but he could barely manage two with Dean even with the lotion to help.

Dean was much tighter than anything he'd experienced before, and not that he blamed him, but the fact he was resisting because he wasn't want it wasn't helping matters. Well, Dean clearly wasn't getting any looser than this, and he couldn’t run the risk of not being able to get it up again, yes it was to be expected under the circumstances, _but that wasn't make it any less humiliating…_ then again if he'd been hard and raring to go that would have just been plain weird… see having sex with your brother had no upside, you were a pervert if you got hard, and a loser if you didn't, he sighed as he glanced down at himself and was surprised to find he was still semi hard, oh well at least it wasn't completely gone. He smeared lotion over the condom and jacked himself mechanically as he circled Dean with some. “Right, um”.

“You finished poking and stretching?”

“Yeah it's not really going to get any looser”.

“I could have told you that, I'm not a chick, and I obviously don't wanna do this, so what do you expect?”

“I'm sorry”.

“Not your fault Sam, neither one of us wants to do this, so let's just get this over with”. Dean slapped his shoulder again, it was his usual brotherly let's do this jock motivation slap, which usually annoyed the hell out of him, yet once again Dean touching him… he glanced down at himself, **_yep that worked_. ** It was weird, he wasn't the least bit aroused, but his body was reacting to the mystical craziness, and he could only hope it was enough to keep him hard long enough to do this as he took himself in hand, lining up and pushing forward.

Dean made a muffled sound of pain his voice strangled in his throat as his back arched off the bed and his face contorted.

“Easy Dean” he was surprised to find he could barely make his voice work, because _something was happening,_ whatever dark thing was gripping him was being driven back, it was working! but the feeling of electricity in his skin was intensifying instead of fading, and there was this terrible driving urge to _move_. He didn't want to hurt Dean more than he already was _but to banish them both permanently he had to finish the ritual, he had no choice._ He moved forward, pushing in deeper, watching Dean's face as he did, _he still couldn't **believe** he was doing this! _

Dean's face was a mask of pain, and his stiff resistance was making it close to impossible to move any further. “Dean please try and relax”.

“Shut up Sam”, Dean ground out his voice strained “This hurts like hell”.

“I'm sorry I'm trying not to hurt you but there's not much more I can do then I am doing. I'm just going slow and easy okay, you have to help me out, you have to relax for me, it will hurt more if I have to fight my way in, you're so damn tight”.

Dean tensed up further as he tried to move again, and Sam gritted his teeth at the feeling, he couldn't help if… he could _feel_ how tight Dean was, it didn't mean that he was enjoying this… _Dean was his brother,_ actually better not to think about that right now. He had to do this or be taken over, trapped in his own body with someone else driving the wheel for eternity, trapped watching them slaughter, the only hope that someone or something could eventually take them out, maybe he would go mad first, but his real fear, the one that he couldn’t even tell Dean, was that the power would… it wasn't like he hadn’t gone dark side before… what if he… this wasn't helping either, he had no choice, he had to prevent the evil gods possessing their bodies from breaking loose and taking over, it was just the end of the world if they did, **no pressure.**

He tried moving forward again and Dean's hand shot out to stop him, pushing him back. “Dean please you have to help me I can't do this, if you don't…. you have to let me get this over with please, if I keep hurting you I won't be able to carry on and then…” _failure was not an option_ , he spread Dean's thighs a little wider apart, and then held his hips down when he tried squirming away, slowly pushing himself all the way in as Dean's eyes slammed shut and his face contorted in pain.

“Sorry, I’m sorry Dean” he whispered pushing in until his balls were against Dean’s ass, trying to ignore how it felt because Dean's hand was still on his chest, he was still touching him and that…

Dean was biting into his lower lip because it really frigging **hurt** _and then Sam had to push it in that little bit further._

“Sorry” he whispered again as he pulled back and Dean made a choked sound of pain “god, I'm sorry just try and hold on okay”.

Pleasure spiked through Sam as Dean shifted underneath him and he tried to ignore it because judging by Dean's face this was torture for him, and the fact that he or part of him could feel any pleasure at all under the circumstances was making him feel even more guilty, _as if this wasn't difficult enough as it was_. The guilty feeling increased dramatically as he realised that despite his guilt over feeling physical pleasure at Dean's expense, his erection wasn't faltering at all _if anything he was actually getting harder._

“Fuck Dean, I'm sorry” he moaned, - _wait was that a moan? -_ as he pulled back and Dean tightened around him even more as he tried to push back in. “Dean please don't, please try to relax”.

“Easy for you to say” he hissed through gritted teeth “just be thankful that you're the little brother or you would be going through this not me”.

“Is that why you couldn't do it to me Dean?” he murmured watching Dean's face, “because I'm your little brother?”

“Of course” Dean ground out his voice strained as a Sam started to move inside him just little movements until he could pull back all the way.

“Fuck, damn, _hurts”_ Dean groaned as Sam pushed back into him.

Pleasure lanced through Sam again and he was forced to admit that despite everything it felt good, correction he thought as he pulled back and pushed in again _it felt amazing, **god this was fucked up**._

“No” Dean groaned his voice strained, his other hand going to his shoulder as he pushed him back harder.

“Dean we've been through this, _we have to_ “.

“No, I mean not so deep”.

Oh Dean wasn't trying to push him off, he was trying to control the depth... “fuck sorry,” he panted breathing hard and trying not to think about why, “I'm gonna take it nice and slow okay, just trust me”.

“Stop talking and just do it already” Dean hissed, his face flushed, and his lower lip bleeding where he had bitten too hard. Irrationally he suddenly wanted to kiss it away, or was it just that he just wanted to kiss Dean? And he was _still_ rock hard, _this was crazy_ , what was happening to him? did he actually _want_ to do this now or was it still the possession? he didn't know, but he had to get this over with Dean was hating every second of it and the way his body was reacting to Dean was actually starting to weird him out.

“Try to take it okay Dean. I'm sorry but for this to work I have to... I have to come okay, need to move a bit for that to happen just try to bear it, I'll be as quick as I can”.

“Hey, _you didn't say anything about that before!”_

“Didn't think you could handle that on top of everything else, I'm going to do it now okay” He leaned over Dean laying completely on top of him. It felt even more intimate this way and his body reacted heating up as his cock started to throb inside Dean. “Relax, relax” he groaned as he tried to move but Dean was closed around him like a vice there was nothing he could do to carry on without hurting him… he was breathing harder because the feeling of being gripped so tightly was seriously intense; _maybe he could come if he stayed like this_.

“Please” Dean ground out, his face a study in pain.

It would take too long to come this way, to finish the ritual he had to and Dean clearly couldn’t take much more, he had to speed this up, _he had to move_. He held on to Dean's hips pinning him down to the bed, as he pulled halfway out, spreading Dean's legs a little wider with his knees and pushing back in careful not to go too deep as Dean made a choked sobbing sound, “Sorry Dean I’m trying”.

“It's okay just get it over with” Dean gritted out.

Sam suddenly felt something crawling up over him, something licking at his spine hot and intense, but it wasn't coming from _them_ it was coming from **_him._** “Should probably kiss you to make the connection stronger”, he found himself growling as he started to move and intense pleasure slammed into him with every thrust, “need to kiss you Dean okay”, Dean's eyes opened and suddenly he was staring into his eyes while fucking him, he was expecting it to make it too awkward, to have to look away, instead it fuelled the feeling of connection, fed the insane fire that had started burning in him, and suddenly he started feeling the first tremors of climax, _as fucked up as it was, Dean looking at him while he did this was getting him there faster._

He lowered his head and kissed Dean as he moved inside him and Dean's eyes slid shut as he deepened the kiss tasting Dean's salty sweet blood and swallowing his gasps and grunts and moans as he quickened the pace “keep looking at me” he demanded against his lips, “keep looking at me okay”.

“Just hurry up Sam” Dean hissed in pain.

 ** _So good_** _. “Dean”_ he groaned helplessly, because he couldn't help himself because he'd never felt anything so good in his life before, “oh fuck Dean” he panted because he was getting close, when he started he'd thought he'd need a miracle to get to climax and now he was racing towards it, and Dean was making the most depraved sounds he'd ever heard as he drove into him again and again, not pleasure exactly but _fuck it was hot,_ as he tried to touch Dean, tried to bring him pleasure.

“Sam _don't”_ , Dean whimpered just get it over with _please_ “.

GOD Dean was _beautiful_ was suddenly all he could think as he took him, watching his face. Dean was beautiful, and sexy, and strong and Vulnerable, and ridiculous, and Moody, and loyal, and **_God he was beautiful_** and he smelled like home because Dean was his, he always had been, and he loved him in the most fucked up ways imaginable, and he wasn't letting him go ever again, he wasn't losing him to the thing that was trying to take him, and maybe he was going to hell again, because he was enjoying this so much he didn't want it to end, but he didn't care he just wanted to make Dean enjoy it as well, but Dean would barely let him touch him, he wouldn't let him touch his cock.

Sam growled and lay over Dean completely pinning him down when Dean reared away as he kissed him again “soft lips” he breathed “no wonder girls are always sucking face with you”.

Dean had really sensitive nipples Sam discovered as he played with them licked and bit and Dean jolted and sobbed… _sobbed-_ Mr tough guy Dean himself was sobbing in the back of his throat, trying desperately not to let the sounds escape, _fuck how bad was he hurting him? -_ But he couldn't stop now, and not just because he had to finish this, Dean felt so good, so right wrapped around his cock like he was always meant to be his, “come here” Sam groaned pulling Dean down harder on his cock as he throbbed hard inside him trying to ride out the insane wave of pleasure that was pushing him to close to the edge and suddenly It was happening and he felt the thing try to tighten its grip as the light from himself and Dean, the strength of their connection burned into it, and he felt like he was going to combust, like his skin was too tight to hold him in, like the pressure was going to explode him, “Dean I'm gonna come, I'm gonna come” Sam lost his voice to his loud moans of pleasure as he quickly pulled out, ripped off the condom so he was rock hard and dripping wet for him and the sound Dean made as he slowly pushed his naked cock back inside him got him so damn hard it actually started to hurt.

He gripped onto Dean's thighs spread him so he could go deeper, so he could fuck him harder, _your mine now Dean mine, no barrier between us, just you and me_. He could feel every little movement inside of him, how hot he was, how incredibly tight, and he felt enveloped by him, saturated by his scent, captivated by his taste, drowning in the overwhelming sensations of Dean, Dean, Dean, every part of Dean like this, skin to skin, inside and out, and Dean was so pliable, his face so _innocent_ looking as he gasped and moaned, biting into his lower lip trying to suppress the sounds he was making, like he was going to allow that! _he wanted to hear him_ , he wanted to make Dean moan in pleasure, he wanted to touch him, stroke him, make him feel good, _make him **like** it._ Next time, _and there **would** be a next time,_ he would do all those things. Next time he would make Dean his, he would start slowly and please him for hours then he would fuck him as hard as he wanted, do everything he wanted to do to him now but couldn't because Dean wasn't ready for it. He wanted so badly to give him pleasure as ran his hands over him, touching him everywhere he could except the one place Dean absolutely wouldn't allow, he kissed him over and over, ignoring when he tried to turn his face away, holding his face still and sliding his tongue into his mouth, delving deep and revelling in the taste of Dean's mouth, in the sweet heady cocktail of his own abandoned moans and their combined breath as he sped up, unable to deny himself.

Ah, god _he loved him_ he loved him so much, _why the hell didn't he realise that he loved him this way before?-_ had the possession changed things or was he really this much in denial?

_Special cases, you know **soulmates**_

Sam looked into Dean's eyes. Dean. Even when it was difficult and he wanted to punch him, he always loved him, and he had always loved him like this; it had been denial, _absolute denial,_ **_well_** _**not anymore.**_ Dean was _his._ He always had been _, Dean_ belonged to him and he belonged to Dean _the one person in the world who he would always come back to no matter what._ His hips picked up speed as he watched the play of emotions on Dean's face... _Beautiful_

“Oh Fuck Sam” Dean sobbed.

“Look at me Dean, please open your eyes”.

“Sam please just finish it, _please”._

“ _Then look at me”._

Dean locked eyes with him _. “I can **feel** it, I can feel our connection,_ **_feels so incredible_** , please let me touch you, let me make you feel good, _please”._

“Sam _don't”,_ Dean hissed as Sam's hand travelled down “Just don't, please just _finish_ _it_ ”.

The music was reaching its intense crescendo as he kissed Dean full on his soft lips fucking into him harder unable to stop himself as he started to come and it almost destroyed him as Dean arched against him and moaned, and all he could think about was how hot he was inside, how good he felt, **_how much he loved him._**

Dean cried out as he lost control of how hard he was thrusting in his climax and Sam's eyes rolled into the back of his head as his climax pounded into him the way he was pounding into Dean, taking him to the brink and _destroying_ him.


	7. And Let Slip The Gods Of War

Sam held Dean's face so he couldn't turn away as he kissed him long and hard before he slowly pulled out of him. He glanced down and was relieved that he hadn't torn Dean, but he had hurt him, he could tell even if Dean wasn't curled up on his side gritting his teeth.

“Dean I'm sorry that hurt that it wasn't good for you” he panted still out of breath, “I wanted to touch you I wanted to try and make it good for you”.

“Never mind that”, Dean ground out between clenched teeth, “is it over now?”

“Yeah it's over, they're gone, _can't you tell?”_

“I wasn't sure, it felt like something happened, towards the end, there was this kinda weird feeling of intense heat it's kinda hard to explain”. Dean sounded tired… he felt alive and energised, his whole body was tingling…

“You don't have to I felt it too, I think that was when they were burned out of our bodies, I was kinda um distracted by that point, but anyway, it defiantly worked, and they weren't the only ones that were burned out”.

“What?”

“My heads a Lucifer free zone”.

“Seriously?”

“Yep he’s definitely gone”.

“I guess your noggin could only take so many invaders at a time, maybe burning them out was like a literal fire sale, everything had to go”.

“I'm just glad that's over with”.

“You and me both brother, because no offence Sammy, that ranked a full 100 on my top 10 worst experiences in the sack”.

 _...That hadn't been what he meant about being glad it was over!_ “Um, okay, so I figured out why they infected us as well”.

“Oh yeah why?” Dean spoke into the pillow clearly not interested in turning around and looking at him.

“Well when we ganked them they went after the two closet living humans who were connected to each other in a deep way that just so happened to be us”. _The closet two living beings that were in love with each other, **they knew and we didn't.**_

“Oh well that's just peachy, wrong place, wrong time, story of our lives, well don't sweat it Sammy, because given the average life span of your hook ups I'll probably bite it next week anyway then we won't have to deal with this”.

“That’s, not funny Dean”. _Didn't Dean get it? them being infected could only mean one thing, they were meant to be together, but not just as brothers, they were a mated pair, **cosmically**. It meant that deep down Dean loved him too in the same fucked up way, Dean was just in denial like he had been, but he was going to make him see it._

Dean tried to move, grimaced in pain and lay back down as Sam covered him with the sheet.

“You know I'm not surprised most of your hook ups end up dead” Dean mumbled into the pillow belligerently “that's not a cock you have down there Sam _it's a fucking death reaming machine”._

Sam was silent for a moment, it wasn't exactly the first time he'd heard something to that effect and it hadn't been a compliment then either… _Ruby could be a real bitch at times,_ it was fine when she wanted him to drink her blood, she gave it her all then, but if he just wanted sex, then out came the comments and complaints about his supposed size problem, he was 6 foot 5 and built, _what the hell did she expect?_ and it wasn't as if he could actually hurt the tiny body she’d chosen, she was still a damn demon after all. He shook his head and banished her memory from his mind, he wasn't about to let thoughts of her mar this moment because whatever Dean thought, he knew how special it was. “it's fine once you get used to it”, he found himself mumbling “you just have to try to relax”.

“You better try that line on someone who's interested”.

 _I am, you just don't know it yet._ “Dean is there anything I can do to-

“-Thanks Sammy believe me you've done more than enough, now just leave me the hell alone”.

“… Alright I'll go and get us some food”. Oddly, although he should probably be starving he wasn't hungry, it was like he was tingling with pent up excitement, yet satisfied in every way. Dean on the other hand needed food, _not least of all because he was always way more belligerent when he was hungry._ He quickly wiped himself down and threw on the what he'd been wearing earlier. A shower would have to wait; getting Dean something to eat fast was the least he could do considering... then there was the more disturbing matter of him being covered in the scent of his own brother... **and liking it.** Oh well, if he didn't have deep rooted issues this thing with Dean probably wouldn’t work, _and it was going to work._ “I'll be as quick as I can, um, you rest for a bit okay”.

“Sammy”.

“Yeah?”

“I'm sorry, I know you didn't want to do that any more than I did”.

**_Er…_ **

“And I know you tried to… well make it easier, saying all that girly stuff about liking it and trying to feel me up, it didn't really help, but I appreciate you trying”.

… _well_

“Believe me Sam, anything you did to take my mind of the fact you had your baseball bat sized cock shoved up my ass is appreciated”.

“…well, um” _Damn it! Dean had hated it **that** much? He’d hurt him that badly, yet his own body was **still** tingling... _

“You don't have to say anything Sammy just please I'm begging you-

“-I know don't talk about it again”.

“Well yeah obviously, but I was gonna say don't forget the pie, and make it a double helping, second thought just buy me the whole damn pie”.

“Okay”.

“What no comments?”

“Not today, you've earned it”.

“Well now you're making me sound like a hooker, well if you're gonna leave money on the dresser think 50s not 10s, not that you can afford me”.

Sam smiled because for once Dean's terrible jokes were actually making him feel better, at least Dean was talking to him, at least he didn't hate him for what you've been forced to do... _Or for liking it so much_. “Double helping of Pie coming right up”.

“Bastard” Dean groaned and he smiled, like he'd actually buy Dean an entire Diner sized pie! _Maybe when hell froze over twice and by magic cholesterol, diabetes, and heart disease had ceased to be a thing._ “I'll be back soon just try and rest until then”.

“… Erm Sam”.

“Yeah”.

“Why’d you … you know what, never mind”.

“What?”

“Why’d you take off the condom, I mean you er… came in... which FYI feels really weird on the receiving end, think I owe a few ex-girlfriends an apology, I always thought it felt as good for them as it did for me... Er not that I've done that in years of course, safety first, God knows you've lectured me enough about it”.

Sam's eyes narrowed. _If there was one thing that was going to change around here it was Dean's incessant man-whoring, **he didn't share what was his.**_

“...Well why'd ya do it?”

“Er. Yeah… about that…” _because I needed to feel you, needed to mark you as mine, **because I couldn't help myself** _

“I just can't figure out why, I mean you're the one that said it wouldn't make any difference, did you find out it was making a difference while you were…”

“…Well…”

“Okay I guess I just answered my own question”.

“I'll be back soon”.

“Yeah just hurry up and go will ya”.

Dean was grimacing again and Sam was starting to worry he may have inadvertently done some real damage to Dean.

“I'm fine” Dean snapped reading him effortlessly, it hurts like hell, but nothing's broken- now get moving, the least you can do after everything you just did to me is get me some damn pie, and also whisky would not be a bad way to go, I'm out- so you know, _give generously”._

“Okay Dean, whatever you want”.

He stared over at Dean before closing the motel door.

A thought struck him as he got into the car and his hand paused before he put the key in the ignition. _It was wrong he knew it,_ but… he had done terrible things too, unforgivable things… and although they were evil, they had loved each other so much, that orientation, species, status, even death, all of it meant nothing against their connection. He could relate, nothing else mattered when your connection was so strong… Dean was his Soulmate, only the power of a connection that strong could override the fact they were brothers.

The connection of a Soulmate was something cosmic, something he suspected even the angels themselves didn’t fully understand. He also knew what happened when that connection was corrupted, the fallout, the damage. Was he supposed to believe the trail of dead lovers in his life was coincidental? **_Anyone else was getting in the way_** , if he'd understood that sooner, Jess, Madison, Sarah, heck his high school prom date... they would all still be alive if they had never met him.

So yes it was wrong, they were blood-thirsty murderers, and he didn’t regret stopping them, but the chances were he would never have understood how he truly felt about Dean if they hadn't been possessed by them, he would never have gotten Lucifer out of his head… he would never have what he had now…

So not that anyone out there owned him a favour, but still if any power was listening on any side of the equation, maybe the warrior and his goddess would end up together somewhere. Maybe as a regular mortal non-murdering couple, maybe a plain normal suit and tie wearing Adam and Steve, or Anna and Eve with a suburban life and some over pampered pets; or probably better for everyone, maybe they could transcend the physical and be two spirits together, somewhere out there.

it was a vast cosmos wasn’t it?- there had to be _somewhere_ they couldn't wreak murderous havoc didn’t there? …So maybe if anyone was listening, _maybe please send them there?_

#  ** ************************** **

Sam let himself into the hotel room. It was just starting to get dark and Dean had apparently cleaned himself up and closed the curtains while he was out. Dean's bed was a sexed up mess, so he was now laying in his bed, wearing his favourite ACDC T-shirt and was fast asleep.

He sat on the side of the bed, placing the two slices of cherry pie and small bottle of whisky on the cheap motel dresser. So okay fine apparently he was just going to sit here watching his brother sleep... He wasn't tired... Or hungry, and maybe his heart was racing a little as he leaned forward. Dean smelled of water, and Old Spice, and he could swear that Dean smelled of _him_. **He liked it,** he liked that Dean couldn't wash him off completely, that he was all over him, that his scent had seeped into his skin. He was expecting to be at least a little disturbed by how his feelings towards Dean were suddenly sexual, not to mention the fact even a cursory examination of his symptoms namely: tingling, excited, heart racing, can't eat, can't sleep, provided only one possible prognosis, _he was definitely in love..._ _With his own brother, it barely made sense,_ but as he touched Dean's hair to find it was still a little damp from his recent shower he found that he wasn't disturbed at all. In fact, all he could think about was what he had just done with Dean, playing it over in his mind again and analysing it.

 _He would never have believed his big brother was so sexually subservient._ Dean was **_seriously_** bossy, he'd bossed him around his entire life, yet when he got his cock in him Dean was _his_ , completely and utterly his, and right or wrong it had been amazing, touching him, being inside him, fucking him, even dominating him the way he had, pinning him down and ordering him to look at him while he fucked him. _He didn't care what it said about him or their relationship that he couldn't wait to do it again._

It was going to be difficult because Dean clearly didn't want to do it again, but that was just too bad, it was going to happen, he knew his brother, he knew him literally inside and out, Dean couldn't refuse him anything he really wanted, not for long at any rate, and certainly not forever, **_and that was how long he intended to pursue him._**

Sam leaned over and kissed the side of Dean's face, “I love you” he whispered.


	8. When Mickey Kissed Mallory

“Alright Sam _this is getting weird_ , first you keep buying me beer, and paying for my meals all of a sudden, and you even quit bitching about what I eat and yesterday I swear you were gonna try and open the Impala door for me before I gave you the death glare, I mean Jeeze Sammy It's been 3 weeks are you still feeling guilty because some demented Gods tried to Mickey and Mallory us to death and you had to bang me to force them out of our bodies because believe me Sam, If ever anything gets you a -sorry I sexed you up and didn't even buy you dinner first- free pass _that would be it_ , so why are you still acting like I'm some damn virgin chick you despoiled of her precious virtue and now you feel guilty about it, I mean what's next flowers, chocolates, and a damn proposal?”

“You're kind of half right Dean”.

“Well What the hell am I supposed to think when you're acting so weird and- wait **_I'm_** **_what_?!** ”

“... I er Just think that maybe we should try um being together or something…” his voice trailed off lamely and he could have kicked himself because this was not how it was supposed to go at all when Dean finally caught wind of what he was up to, which he knew he would eventually, he was supposed to have some great speech prepared to convince Dean that this was right, heck he did have a great speech prepared, just right now when he needed it most, he was suddenly nervous as hell in front of the guy he'd been around his entire life, and he couldn't remember a word of it!

“Come again?”

“Um, I mean, I Just think that with what happened we should probably you know try…”

“Try what?”

“Come on Dean you know what it meant, _what It means_ that we were able to force them out of bodies with our connection to each other, it means that we're both...”

“We're both what Sam?”

“It means we're in love with each other Dean, and you know it, _Stop making this harder than it has to be and just face up to it already”._

“We were possessed Sam! Whatever happened between us because of it doesn't count! and it sure as hell doesn't mean that we secretly have the hots for each other”.

“Actually Dean _that's **exactly** what it means”._

“look Sam we're brothers, we're Supposed to love each other and we were able to use that to-

“-Dean, _**enough.**_ It meant more than that and you know it”.

“...Sam....we can't ... we can't _be together_ , not in that way, it's wrong! We did what we had to do to survive, and to stop those freaks from massacring any more innocent people, that doesn't mean that it's suddenly okay to-

“-Yeah we were doing what we had to”, Sam moved closer to Dean, “but what if it suddenly started feeling good, I mean _really good”._ Sam moved closer, “what if I suddenly found that I was enjoying every single second of it Dean, what then?” Sam lowered his head so their faces were an inch apart whispering “I know you know I was enjoying it at the end”.

“I know you were _fake_ enjoying it at the end to burn them out”.

“You ever see anyone come that hard from _fake_ enjoying it?”

“Fine, so you didn't fake that, _big deal_ , it was all to send those pagan dicks packing wasn't it so-

-Dean was cut off by Sam catching his hand as he gesticulated and placing a kiss in the centre of his palm. Dean's mouth fell open in shock and his eyes flew to Sam's as everything suddenly became crystal clear to him. “Sam you have to be kidding me, you actually _want_ to do **that** again?”

“ ** _Yes_** , I know it wasn't good for you the last time but-

“-That's an understatement Sammy **_it hurt like hell!”_**

“I'm sorry about that Dean, I tried my best not to hurt you but it was your first time and-

“-How the hell do you know that?” Dean snapped defensively, “how do you know you're the only one to get a piece of this sweet ass since I've been back from the hotbox?”

Sam leaned forward and kissed Dean and Dean jerked his head back “cut that out Sam”.

“I know I'm the first Dean because I know you, since you got back there has hardly been any women yet alone men”.

Dean made a face at Sam, “doesn't mean you can just go assuming all kinds of things, like you're more experienced than me all of a sudden”.

“Oh come on Dean this isn't a competition!” Dean's stance and expression changed from defensive to confrontational, showing that at least to Dean's mind it was a competition.

“And what makes you think you get to top?” Dean snapped.

Sam's mouth fell open, “because you're the one that said-

“-Yeah well that was different, that was saving lives and junk, this is just because you want to, what makes you think I'm into that?”

Sam smiled, “if you want to top me Dean _all you have to do is ask_ ”.

 _“ **Damn it Sam**_ _this isn't what this is about, we can't-_

“-Tell you what Dean let's just see how it goes okay”.

“wha-

-Sam cut off Dean's objection by kissing him long and hard, his heart in his throat the entire time because everything was riding on this as he used every ounce of skill he possessed to coax Dean's mouth open, to slide his tongue into his mouth, to touch him, taste him, feel him, _until Dean started responding,_ and suddenly his heart wasn't in his throat anymore it was soaring in his chest.

_Special cases… soul mates_

**_Damn Right Ash._ **


	9. Freud Would Have A Field Day

“Would you come back to bed already Dean”.

“No Sam, I told you what happened last night was a one-time thing.”

Sam rolled his eyes, “you said that last night, and the night before last, and the night before that, and-

“-Shut up Sam I mean in this time-

“-Every night this week”.

“Look Sam it's too messed up”.

Sam crossed his arms over his muscular chest, a small smile playing on his lips as he noticed Dean was looking and trying not to look. “Dean we've been over this, usual rules don't apply, incest is clearly best, blah blah, _just get back in the bed already”._

“No Sam, I mean this has got to stop and-

“-Fine if you're not coming here I'm coming to you”.

Dean backed up and Sam found himself laughing as Dean's back hit the motel door and he had no place to go unless he was planning on running out into the motel parking lot naked… then again given how Dean was acting lately, namely having hot, soul bending, earth-shattering sex with him, and then freaking out and shutting himself up in the bathroom swearing it was never going to happen again, he just might run into the motel parking lot naked.

“Dean we're not doing anything wrong”, Sam tried for calm and rational.

“Oh how the hell can you say that!” Dean bellowed.

How was he expected to have a conversation with Dean when they were both naked and he just wanted to- Alright that was it! If Dean wanted it up against the motel door again _then that was how he would get it_. “Dean for god's sake come back to bed”.

“No Sam, that's, I mean we shouldn't have-

“Which time?” Sam snapped fed up with Dean's drama, “The time I fucked you up against the door, or just now when you blew me until my skull exploded?”

Dean looked away and Sam rolled his eyes, “I was kinda hoping you could do me next”.

“No I…” Dean raced into the bathroom and slammed the door and Sam had just had enough. Dean clearly wasn't expecting him to kick down the motel bathroom door, yes their security deposit was gone for sure, but the way Dean leapt into the corner hiding told him something else was up.

“Dean what have you got there?”

“Nothing”.

Sam pulled Dean to his feet and wrestled the photo out of his hand.

_It was a picture of…_

_So that's what this is about_ , it was a picture of a four-year-old Dean holding him, he had to be about 3 months old in the picture; so that's what had been happening they had been having sex and then Dean had been coming in here and guilt-tripping himself death? Sam's eyes narrowed, _he wasn't going to allow this to continue._

“Look at me Dean” he insisted his voice low, “really _Look. At. Me._ do I look like this kid in the picture anymore? Do you? this was taken before everything, we're not those kids anymore, we haven't been since dad, heck since mom, a few months after this picture was taken those kids were gone forever, why are you wasting time living in the past?”

“You need to stop thinking of me as that kid Dean, I'm not him anymore, how many times have I died since that picture was taken, how many times have you, we've been to heaven, hell, and purgatory, at this point we're human because no one wants to dare to say otherwise, not to our faces at least, but you know what they call us behind our backs, and that's just other hunters, never mind the demons and monsters”.

“Stop it Sam”.

“They call us freaks Dean, they warn other hunters to stay away from us, we've become Gordon, the best hunters but stay the heck out of their way if you want to live”.

“Sam this isn't about-

“-Some say we're no better than the monsters we hunt, but I don't care what they say Dean, because we're still here, we're still alive, and we still have a job to do”.

Sam moved closer to Dean and pulled him forward “most of them think we're banging each other anyway, most think we've been doing it for years, you know that Dean, so why are you acting like anyone would be shocked if they found out”.

Dean's eyes darted to the picture again, “Is this about Mom and Dad Dean?”

“How can it not be Sam”.

“They're both gone Dean, we've been on our own for a long time, and no matter what, they loved us, they would understand better than anyone else why we're so connected to each other”.

“Sam I can't, do you understand? I can't any more”.

Sam held Dean's vision and slowly deliberately tore the photograph in half.

“Sam! that was the only copy”.

“I don't care”, Sam snapped pulling Dean forward and shoving him so he was facing the bathroom mirror, “look at us”, Sam growled pressing up behind him, “do we look like those kids anymore, what do you see when you look at me, do you really still see your innocent little baby brother?”

Sam pulled off the towel Dean had wrapped around his waist.

“Sam don't”.

“Don't what Dean? Don't fuck you? Don't make you feel good- don't make us both feel good?”

Sam kicked Dean's legs apart, and pulled down his own sleeping shorts.

“We are not those kids any more” he hissed spitting on his palm slicking them and forcefully pushing his way into him, “don't look away”, he titled Dean's chin up, “Look at your face when I'm fucking you Dean, _I said look_ , watch yourself getting fucked by me, watch us both. Get over the past Dean and give us a chance to be happy, -ah- don't we -fuck, ah- don't we -ah- deserve it after everything we've been through?- I love you Dean” Sam moaned burying his face in Dean's neck as he fucked him harder, “I love you and I know you love me too you always have”.

Suddenly Dean was turning his head to the side and kissing him back, kissing the hell out of him as he wrapped his arms around Dean and fucked him harder.

“I'm yours Sammy” Dean moaned against his mouth, “yours, always have been, I guess I'm going back to hell after all”.

“Not without me” Sam hissed, “wherever you go I go, we share heaven remember, _so if we're going to hell we're sharing that too._ Love you Dean- _fuck, you're making me come”_ he moaned closing his hand around Dean's cock and jerking him off into the sink, gritting his teeth as he came so hard his legs got weak. Dean turned in his arms and kissed him again and it almost blew his skull off, so Dean had been holding out on him huh, _well his sex life was certainly looking up,_ things were going to get pretty interesting he could tell.

“Oh god no” Dean moaned sounding horrified.

“What?”

“I can't believe I- on the photograph, that's just, oh man, Freud would have a field day”.

Dean had that ‘I need whisky to block this out’ look on his face and Sam realised that the torn pieces of the photograph had fallen into the sink and he'd inadvertently made Dean come all over them. _There was only one thing for this._ Sam marched into the motel bedroom, grabbed the whisky and his lighter dumped the whiskey in the sink, **_and torched the whole damn mess._**

Dean's mouth fell open as he whispered horrified “Sammy I think you actually just ruined whiskey for me”.

“Good” Sam growled gripping the back of his neck and kissing him hard, the forgotten fire in the sink blazing out of control as he dragged Dean down to the floor, “you drink too damn much of it anyway”.

#  ** ************************** **

They were speeding away from the motel as fast as they could, the fire had somehow caught the old wooden medicine cabinet and the thin plastic shower curtain had melted in places, and the fire extinguisher didn't really work and well they may have more or less burnt the bathroom down. Their security deposit was gone, they accepted that, but being arrested for arson was a much deeper issue so after finally managing to put the fire out by dumping the hotel bed covers over it and starving it of oxygen they knew they had to get the hell out.

“Yep defiantly ruined whisky for me… I suppose I could switch to vodka or rum”, Dean glanced over at Sam as he sped down the deserted road.

“Like hell”, Sam growled distracted by the way Dean's neck still bore the marks of his teeth.

“What are you looking at? _Goddamn it Sam, you didn't give me another damn hickey did you?”_ Dean tried recklessly to look at his neck in the rear view mirror while driving, “what the hell is it with you and that?!” he growled taking in the blazing red hickey on his neck.

“Pull over” Sam hissed.

“Not happening Sammy, we never have and never will have sex in this car _do you understand me?”_

“That's why I said to pull over _I'm going to have sex with you on **top** of the car”._

“ **Like hell you are!** ”

#  ** ************************** **

“You're lucky it's hot as hell out here so we didn't freeze to death and you're lucky there's no one around”, Dean grumbled as Sam collapsed over Dean, “and get off me, my backs sticking to the hood of the car, and I think you rammed a dent in it”.

“You or the car? Sam mumbled, not wanting to move from where he was laying on top of Dean, lazily grazing his teeth along Dean's neck.

_“Both you frigging savage!”_

Sam lifted his head, “are you alright?”

“Hey, no talking to me like I'm a chick on prom night!”

Sam collapsed his face into the groove of Dean's neck, “wouldn't dream of it” he murmured kissing the new marks he'd made.

“Sam I swear I'm going to kick your ass if you mark up my neck again, have you forgotten what happened last week when that old lady noticed and started making comments about my lucky wife until she noticed the way you were staring and up-ended the iced tea she was serving me into my damn lap”.

“No idea what you're taking about Dean” Sam lied.

“Yeah right; now _off”_.

Sam reluctantly eased out of Dean and pulled him up to his feet.

 _“Sonuvabitch!”_ Dean yelped as his back was separated from the heated hood of the impala. “ _I'm never **ever** doing that again”._

“Well if you hadn't started struggling when I tried to bend you over the hood then-” Sam caught the fist Dean only half seriously swung at him and kissed it.

“We better get moving” Dean murmured and Sam smiled because despite that insanely good sex they'd just had Dean was still uncomfortable with public displays of affection even when there was no one around to witness it.

“In a minute Dean, I just want to be with you like this”.

“What stark naked?”

“We've sat out and watched the stars before Dean”.

“Stark naked?”

“ _Fine,_ we'll get dressed, then can we just sit out here for a minute?”

“I don't know, we got any beer?”

“Yeah I think we got a few cans stashed in the cooler”.

“You gotcha yourself a date then Sammy”.

“I kinda love that you're a such a cheap date Dean”.

“In your dreams Sammy I'm not your boyfriend”.

“Yes you are”, Sam was suddenly serious as he yanked Dean forward and kissed him hard _“you are”._

Dean was quiet for a moment as they stood there pressed together breathing in each other’s air, “okay Sammy” Dean murmured quietly. Dean pushed Sam back a little and headed for his clothes “but there are some ground rules Sammy. First of all, no treating me like a girl, you try that and it's go time, second of all no calling me your boyfriend in public ever, third of all-

“-Marry me Dean”

 _“_ **_What?!”_ **

“You heard, _marry me”._

“But-

“You don't want me calling you my boyfriend in public fine, marry me then I can call you my-

“-You say wife _and I swear to **god** -_

Sam put both his palms up, “I was gonna say husband I swear!”

Dean's eyes narrowed and Sam smiled because Dean was right he had been about to say wife if only to rile Dean up.

“I don't care what you say Sam, we're not getting married, _that's just ridiculous_ “.

“Why?”

“Because we're brothers for a start and-

“-We're both legally dead we can get married as whoever the hell we want to be, and we happen to be Soulmates Dean, if any two people should be married it's us”.

“Not the Soulmate thing again Sam, it's really not that big a deal”.

Sam burst out laughing, “wow Dean! The lengths you will go to not to have to deal with this!”

“Well it's just, it's -

Sam held up his palms in mock surrender again, “I get it Dean, it's a big frigging cosmic deal, but you can't just ignore it, I mean have you forgotten the only reason we were able to survive possession is because we are-

“-I know alright, I know, but that doesn't automatically mean that we have to get married”.

“Have too no, _I want to Dean_ , I want to tell the damn world that you're _mine_ “.

“Oh wow, I cannot believe you just said that, -that's like the cheesy line in every romantic comedy ever written'.

Sam raised a brow, “Thought you didn't watch chick flicks Dean”.

“You don't have to watch them to know the cheesy one liners, they put them in every goddamn trailer”.

“Well cheesy one liner or not, I mean it, I want you to marry me so just shut up and say yes already before I change my mind about asking, and hog-tie you in front of a justice of the peace, I'm getting an I do out of you one way or another Dean so you may as well just go along with it”.

Dean mouth fell open. “What the hell kind of proposal was that” he bellowed finally finding his voice again. “You must be out of your mind if you think-

“-Hogtieing it is then” Sam growled advancing on him as he pulled up his zip.

“Sam, Sam, just listen-

“-Done listening Dean, we're getting married and that's final”.

“Sam, alright, look just gimme sometime okay, I mean shouldn't I be asking you, I'm the older brother after all... _cannot **believe** I just said that”._ Dean ran his hand over his face and Sam smiled at him.

“Wait right here Dean”.

“Where the hell else am I gonna go?”

Sam disappeared behind the impala rooting around in the trunk, he reappeared and handed Dean a beer, “to us”.

“I'll drink to that” Dean opened his beer tapping it to Sam's and took a long sip. “There a ring inside?” he drawled amused.

“Got something better than a ring” Sam murmured reaching into his pocket, “been meaning to give this to you for a long time, never could find the right moment, but if there ever was one this would be it”. Sam reached into his pocket and pulled out something Dean hadn't seen in a long time.

“Will you wear this again for me Dean? Will you be mine completely just like you used to before Cas, before Ruby, when it was just me and you and no one could ever come between us”.

Dean couldn't find any words so he just nodded solemnly, and allowed Sam to slip the old familiar worn leather around his neck, and as the amulet settled in its old familiar spot he felt like something had been returned to him but it wasn't an old piece of lost metal and the leather band that held it in place, it was Sam, it was him and Sam, the piece of their relationship that had been damaged by betrayal and jealousy, they were overcoming that today, not just burying it in their past but truly facing and overcoming it.

“Dean Winchester you're the other half of my soul, there is no one else for me, will you marry me?”

“Yeah, alright Sammy whatever you want” Dean husked visibly struggling with his emotions.

“Good” Sam whispered his eyes glimmering with unshed tears “because I meant what I said about not taking no for an answer”.

Sam pulled Dean into a long hard kiss- ”Ignore it” Sam groaned against Dean's mouth when his phone started to ring, but Dean froze in his arms. “What is it?”

“That's… no way that's- Dean snatched the phone out of his pocket answering and growling “If this is someone's idea of a sick joke, you have no idea how dead you are you sunuvabit- _Oh my god you're_ …” Dean sat back on the hood of the impala as if in shock.

“What the hell's going on Dean? Who-

“-Okay, alright just stay put, **_no stay put,_** I'm on my way”.

“Dean what...” Sam's expression darkened _jimmy Hendrix's ‘Angel',_  that was the ringtone. “Dean is that-

“-No just stay there” Dean barked –click- “Sam we have to move now”, Dean's eyes were wide, “Sam Cas is back, _he's alive”._


	10. Does Ash Ever Get Board of Being Right?

Sam's mouth fell open in shock, Cas had been back close to a month and barely spoken a word, and this was what he led with?!

Dean had been pretending that everything was all right with Cas who seemed to have his personality reset to the ‘nerdy little dude with wings’ persona Dean had ironically taken under his wing all those years before. Dean believed Cas just needed time ‘to get back into the swing of things’, and he'd dragged his stoic friend on hunts, and pub crawls, and to strip joints, and to his annoyance was currently forcing him to pretend that they weren't together until Cas ‘got his sea legs’ and could handle hearing about it.

Personally, he thought Dean was using the current situation as a good excuse to slam the breaks on their relationship and hide his obvious gay panic, _which was ridiculous,_ what was it going to take for Dean to get it? _soulmates beat orientation, **BIG TIME!**_

“Alright Cas, since you just bought up that you tried to be with Dean like you're apologising, and since you got your Mojo back last week and can read Dean's mind again, although I'm guessing he's forgotten about that, I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say you know about him and me; so spill, say what you have to, only say it to me Cas not to Dean, he's having a hard enough time getting his head around this whole soulmate thing as it is”.

“You are correct Sam I am aware of what has happened between you and Dean, and I understand from studying humans that an Ex as it were can be a problem, so you may feel you have a right to know what transpired between Dean and I in the past”.

Sam sighed, “I'm not sure I actually want to hear about this, but what exactly happened between you and my brother?”

“A few weeks before I supposedly died, the first time that is, I um confessed my feelings to Dean, and then I attempted to kiss him. It was not received well”.

“And what does that mean exactly?”

“He struck me in the face and told me I had no right to get handsy with him just because I had ‘gone gay’. I explained that I had not ‘ _gone gay’_ , and reminded him that I have no gender, but it didn't seem to make things better, he said we were never to speak of it again and then assured me that it would not affect our friendship and suggested alcohol and partially clothed females were the solution to what I thought I was feeling. I disagreed”.

“...Okay” Sam drawled, knowing there just had to be more to this particular story, but there was a better question to be asking right now. “Cas, do you still want more than friendship with Dean?”

“He has made his feelings on the matter very clear”.

“That’s not what I asked you”.

“No of course not, I have since understood that I was, how can I put this… man crushing on Dean, that is, I was confusing physical attraction with love”.

Sam's eyes narrowed “so you're saying you’re attracted to him but you don't love him?”

“No”.

“So you love him but you’re not attracted to him is that it?”

“I'm clearly not explaining this correctly, I'm saying I love him, and of course he is attractive… for a human, but the relationship I have with him is not dependent on a physical relationship”.

“Then why the hell did you try to kiss him?”

“Because Dean likes physical relationships and I wanted him to understand how I felt”.

“You mean you didn't think Dean would understand that you loved him unless there was sex involved”.

“Well you're having sex with him and you love him so…

Sam sighed, “It's not the same thing Cas, and frankly I don't think you understand your own feelings for Dean”.

“I do”.

“Are you sure? Because what you’re explaining doesn't really make any sense”.

“Human emotions are complicated it's difficult to explain”.

“Yeah I'm sure it is Cas, but you have to be sure, because if you're going to be a problem for me and Dean I need to know about it”.

“I'm not going to be a problem' Cas rasped, ‘I'm just happy to be back in his life, and yours. I consider you both my friends”.

“I know that Cas, but you need to understand that we can't both have Dean”.

“…I was given to understand that Dean-

“-I don't share” Sam stated emphatically, “I don't share the person I'm with and I defiantly will not share Dean with you, if that's what you're thinking you can just forget it, I'm serious about marrying him, and I'm serious about being with him exclusively”.

Cas was silent and Sam sighed “I think you're in love with him Cas, I've pretty much always thought that, why do you think I let it go the one time you kicked his ass, I know a lovers spat when I see one, you couldn't stand the thought of Michael touching him no matter the reason, -even if Dean didn't understand that was why you did it, I did; but here's the thing Cas, it's too late for you and him now, if you wanted him you should have made a play for him back before I realised how I felt. You didn't and he's with me now, so I guess all I want to know from you is if you're going to accept that or not”.

“It would seem that I have no choice in the matter”.

“There's always a choice Cas, and it's up to you, are you going to fight me for him, and be under no mistake it will be a **_fight_** , or are you going to accept that we're together now and let it go?”

Cas was silent for a long time, ‘I came back for him, I made my way back, crawled through hell after the leviathans all but destroyed me. I lost my memory, my mission, I lost everything and I pulled myself back for him… I can't let him go that easily”.

“I understand; I don't like it but I understand”.

Cas turned and pinned Sam with his unblinking stare, “and what about you Sam, if I speak to Dean, if he chooses me over you, will you respect his choice and let him go”.

Sam shook his head slowly, ‘no, _never_ , if somehow that were to happen, I would fight to keep him tooth and nail and I would go on fighting, my running days are over, Dean is what I want and I will stop at nothing, so consider yourself warned”.

“Then I suppose that is all I needed to hear. You have my blessing Sam”.

“I… _what?!”_

“Sam you have a history of running away from Dean and breaking his heart. I know this because I know him so much better than you or even he thinks, and you're right I do love him Sam, but it's different for me than it is for you. I love all of him from his atoms, to his molecules, I love the patterns of his mind, and his thoughts in my head, I love the feel and weight of his heart and the shard of gold in his right eye. I love his stubbornness and his bravery and his loyalty, I love his belligerence, and his bravado, and his vulnerability. I love him completely, I think even unconditionally. I would not give that up to a person who is going to run at the first obstacle”.

“Oh my god Cas you really-

“-Yes I do wholly and completely, and that is why I need to know that you are truly serious about this, about Dean, because you and I both know he is not the easiest person to be with, he can be surly, alcoholic, and he pushes people away, he only likes intimacy on his terms”.

“Cas when did you become an expert on Dean? - and for someone who just said human emotions are complex five minutes ago you sure seem to have a handle on Dean's”.

Cas looked up and sighed, “Sam are you _really_ going to be able to be in this with Dean for the long haul? You know how much he loves you, there is no one he has or even could love more. I truly believe it gives you an unfair advantage over anyone else that wants him, but you already know that, so my question remains the same are you going to run away again or are you going to stay with him for good?”

“I told you, my running days are over”.

“In your case Sam it could well mean forever. If I am with Dean there will come a time when we have to separate, his place is in heaven as a mortal, mine as an Angel. If I am ever to rectify the wrongs I have… it is _beyond_ _forbidden_ to interfere with a human soul in heaven, I can only ever be with him on earth, you can always be with him”.

“Because we share a heaven… or a hell”.

“I will not allow Dean to be sent to hell again, no matter what”.

**_Special cases, soul mates_ **

“I will always be with Dean Cas, on earth, in heaven-

“-I know Sam, I've known since the first time you both died and went to heaven”.

“Which I'm guessing was way before the thing with Ash?”

“Yes”.

“So we went up in heaven sharing?”

“I confess I was actually shocked when I realised what was happening and I did not know how to explain it to you, then Zachariah erased your memories so-

“-Hey!” Dean banged on the hood of the impala, “What the hell are you two doing holed up in my car gossiping like a couple of girls, if this is wedding talk I swear to god Sam _I'm buying you a freaking skirt”._

“No wedding talk Dean just catching up with Cas and talking about how to deal with the leviathan that are loose”.

“Yeah that's why I came out here, Jody just called she and Bobby found something out that will make you smile, I think we finally have a way to gank them”.

“I thought they couldn't be killed”.

“Everything that bleeds can be killed Sammy, jeeze, _have I taught you nothing”._

Sam got out of the car and kissed Dean.

“Hey! I'm guessing from this that Cas knows, but still, no kissing me in front of our friends” Dean grouched.

“You're mine Dean”, Sam growled pulling Dean up hard against his body when Dean tried to walk away and kissing him harder over his objections, “and I’ll kiss you wherever and whenever I want”.

“Like hell you will!” Dean snapped his face flushed as Sam laughed.

Castiel watched Sam and Dean walking towards the motel room, bickering affectionately about something called ‘PDA’ and Dean's rules regarding it. They were walking pressed closely together as they always did and as always he could see their two souls were not separate like almost all humans, but intertwined, fusing and merging separate but united, two halves of one whole, _he’d always found it fascinating._

The two could be separated but it caused pain suffering and eventual death, but for Dean not for Sam. So many things had been done to create Sam, and alter him from his infancy that he just wasn't the same as Dean, and the joining which might have originally been equal was more like 60 40 in Sam's favour, meaning Sam had always been able to break away from Dean with greater ease… or so it always had been in the past, but this time, he could see it, Sam's soul was swirling around the large glow of Dean's, the bright light weaving in and out and circling, as if keeping Dean's soul guarded, Dean's soul in turn was branching out and merging with Sam's, embracing and protecting. The two halves were finally 50-50, merged and combining, touching and guarding, he wondered if they even knew, if they felt the change?

Well so long as it was there, he had no chance with Dean and he could accept that, he loved Dean enough to want what was best for him, and truthfully he wasn't sure how he would fare in a relationship with the hunter, just because he knew him like no other could, and just because he finally realised he wanted him didn’t automatically mean they were ideally suitedm he had to be honest with himself. -And now that Sam and Dean were finally together he could stop worrying about what would happen to Dean, he knew that as long as Dean truly had Sam he wouldn't want anything else.

So Zachariah had been right about Sam and Dean all along even when he hadn't been able to see it.

He remembered the words of Ash when he had last spoken to him in heaven “ _I'm telling you I'm right about those two and when they finally figure it out you're gonna owe me a beer amigo”._

Yes, it would indeed seem that he owed Ash a beer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Not about that waiting for the update life? Want some more good reading right now? Why not check out all of this ;D_
> 
> ###### 
> 
> I think it's safe to say Hot steamy Wincest is your thing if you have read this far. How about Wincest with less of a plot and more of unadulterated smut?! ;D please check out [_**As Happy as Larry**_](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9708401)
> 
> _Dean rides a mechanical bull and Sam is not going to take that laying down, or is he?!_ 

> 
> ###### 
> 
> If you want to join us on the Darkside of the force why not try [_**Smith and Wesson**_](http://archiveofourown.org/works/992744/chapters/1961692)
> 
> _Poor Sam is a mess. Unable to understand who he is and unable to control his attraction to Dean._ 

> 
> ###### 
> 
> If you would like a whole new spin on things why not take a look at [_**Hunted** _](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1057769/chapters/2118972) ...Also pretty dark, just saying ;D
> 
> _It starts with a simple question: How far would you go to get what you want?_ 

> 
> ###### 
> 
> Fancy the mother of all love triangles? [_**Magic Fingers**_](http://archiveofourown.org/works/988845/chapters/1950786)
> 
> _Sam, Dean, the "Magic Fingers", and pesky Angels that don't know how to knock._ 

> 
> ###### 
> 
> Love you some bodyswap style shenanigans, and unabashed high jinks? ;D Check out [_**Angel**_](http://archiveofourown.org/works/946470/chapters/1848093)
> 
> [](http://archiveofourown.org/works/946470/chapters/1848093)
> 
> _Something unexpected happens to Cas and Dean is not exactly helping matters_ 

> 
> _Now personally I do not believe this story is dark at all; it is mostly just dark humour. However, I have been told I am quite mistaken and Dean's full blow obsession with girl-Cas is just not right!_ 

> 
> ** curiobi  ** @ ~ . ~ @
> 
> ###### 
> 
> Still not sure I got what you need? Why not check out my [_**curiobi Master Fic List**_](http://fanficpics.wixsite.com/curiobi-fic-list)
> 
> There's a brief intro including a post ~~rant~~ about corporate a-holes trying to high jack our right to squee and ship who we want to! Then each chapter is a list of all my works in that particular Fandom. Please check it out I'm sure I have something for you gurl, and if not why not give me a prompt in the comments! ;D


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